I look outside and see so many trees. Some are so small, but so twisted and unapproachable. Some are large, but seem to be nothing to be concerned about. My mind keeps wondering what it is about each of the trees that makes me describe it in that particular way.
What is it about the small tree that makes it unapproachable? It seems that my life has given me the gifts that I need to approach both of the trees with confidence, but the small one seems to always give me pause. The big one that seems to give so many others pause is the easy one for me.
That thought is so confusing to me. Certainly I can approach the day to day with such ease. What is it that makes me not want to approach the small tree? Is it the twisted branches? Is it the location of the tree? Is it the desire to stay with what is familiar?
I am comfortable approaching the big tree. I know the rules. I know what is expected. I can plan my day around the big tree. I can always approach it in the same manner and get the same result, and to many the big result is the important result. I am good at approaching the big tree. I like being good at something.
It seems though that my mind is always turning toward the small tree and its twisted branches. I want the challenge, but seem to be avoiding it. Why is that? It is so inviting and so interesting. It is all that is not familiar. It is so small. It requires attention to great detail to truly understand it. The detail is what makes it different from the big tree.
When I look at the big tree I can only see the tree not the branches or the roots or the leaves. I can’t get close enough to it to truly become interested in the details. I can only see the big project, not the people that make up the project.
How do I get caught in the forest and not see the trees? Isn’t it that people are always chastised for not being able to see the forest for seeing the trees? It seems that seeing the trees is the real purpose.
I guess I just climbed the tree I never wanted to climbed before.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Friday, December 25, 2009
Saturday, December 5, 2009
My Angel
I have so many decisions to make in life and sometimes the decision itself seems to take on a life of its own. It seems to dominate the day rather than letting the life I have dominate the day. I seem to think that I have to do it all alone. That I am alone. I know that not to be true in my intellect, but sometimes my heart doesn't believe the truth that exists. I know that I have a husband, children, mother and other family that are there for me in my life. However, I keep thinking of the times when I am struggling on the interior and don't share the struggle with the world.
Who is there for me in those moments to make sure I'm not alone? Today, I am overwhelmed with the answer. The obvious answer is God, and I know that He is always there, but today I seem to most certainly feel the prescense of my guardian angel. How often do I think of my guardian angel? Not very often it seems, but when I do I feel so protected and at peace. Why don't I reflect on this more often? It seems that I should.
I long ago named my guardian angel, but have forgotten the name as I seem to keep this part of my existance tucked away in my mind. I think I will again name my guardian angel. His name shall be Peter. I think of this name, because I think of Peter as a rock, as the foundation of the church. I know that each of us has a piece of the church inside and needs the strength of Peter to keep moving in the right direction. The path to holiness is through accepting the rocks in my life and in allowing the rock of my heart to be molded and chipped into the perfection of myself that God wants for me.
God so lovingly created an angel just to watch over me. I will begin to pray for my angel in thanksgiving for all the quiet service provided during the years of my life. I pray that my decision to open my heart again to the guardian angel in my life takes on a life of its own. I pray that the love of my guardian angel dominates my thoughts today so that I never forget to thank God for my guardian angel and live my life knowing that God is there for me in ways that I don't even know or remember. I pray the stone of my life is open to His call and His love.
Thank you God for another birthday and another day to be in communion with you and my guardian angel.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Who is there for me in those moments to make sure I'm not alone? Today, I am overwhelmed with the answer. The obvious answer is God, and I know that He is always there, but today I seem to most certainly feel the prescense of my guardian angel. How often do I think of my guardian angel? Not very often it seems, but when I do I feel so protected and at peace. Why don't I reflect on this more often? It seems that I should.
I long ago named my guardian angel, but have forgotten the name as I seem to keep this part of my existance tucked away in my mind. I think I will again name my guardian angel. His name shall be Peter. I think of this name, because I think of Peter as a rock, as the foundation of the church. I know that each of us has a piece of the church inside and needs the strength of Peter to keep moving in the right direction. The path to holiness is through accepting the rocks in my life and in allowing the rock of my heart to be molded and chipped into the perfection of myself that God wants for me.
God so lovingly created an angel just to watch over me. I will begin to pray for my angel in thanksgiving for all the quiet service provided during the years of my life. I pray that my decision to open my heart again to the guardian angel in my life takes on a life of its own. I pray that the love of my guardian angel dominates my thoughts today so that I never forget to thank God for my guardian angel and live my life knowing that God is there for me in ways that I don't even know or remember. I pray the stone of my life is open to His call and His love.
Thank you God for another birthday and another day to be in communion with you and my guardian angel.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Ornaments
I am now starting to decorate my house for Christmas, and I keep thinking of bubbles. I think of these as I unpack the ornaments. All are so perfectly round and so perfectly the right size. I remember thinking of bubbles as I filled a bathtub full of water this morning and the bubbles moved through the water. Each so perfect but so different. Each having no color, but having the perfect presence. Each one brings me to the next place in its shape. Each one has the continuous fluid nature that draws me in to each one.
It is the clarity of the bubble draws me in. I can see through it and beyond it, but stay fixed on it. I see it move through the water away from the source of the bubble, the faucet. I see so many different shapes. I see some so small and gentle that the bubble doesn’t last very long. I see some medium and big ones that move away from the source that seem to fade at different rates. The big ones that seem so strong, pop when I least expect it. The medium ones seem to feed off of the movement of the faucet and seem to actually acknowledge the need for the water source and seem to grow bigger and more and more full of purpose as they move away from the faucet. However, it seems that some can’t move away from the source without bursting. These bubbles seem to be without purpose.
Can it be that these bubbles are teaching me that I can’t really exist unless I know my purpose? I can be strong, but destroyed if I don’t feed off of the source of life. Leads me to question what is the purpose of my life? Is my life what it should be? What is it that I am supposed to be anyway?
I know at my core that I am supposed to be a wife and a mom. I’ve always known that about myself. I felt called to the vocation. That is the easy part of my journey. The extension of that call is what brings me the most pauses in my day. How do I make the most of that call? I so want to move through the water bringing calmness to the moment rather than bringing a storm to the moment. I want the bubbles to lead me.
I want to know that I can turn to something to lead me. The confusion in my life begins when I stop believing that there is a path. How often I look to the distortions in my life as the path instead of the source of the life in my life. I need to begin to focus on the bubbles that form in my life from the choices and the life of those that are attached to me as I move through my day.
How does this lead to my Christmas decorations? The circles of life always appear on the Christmas tree. Isn’t that what God wants? He seems to want us to focus on circles that never stop rather than lines that have an end point. He called us to a place that exits as a circle. He calls us to a life that begins and ends as best explained as the circle of life. He brings those things into our home most especially this Christmas season in the community I’ve built though the circle of people I invite into my home. He makes me acknowledge the bubbles in my life. He makes me acknowledge that the ornaments in my life define who I am. I can choose the ornaments and whether to display them or keep them hidden.
I pray the ornaments in my life allow me to expand my circle and lead me to true purpose of my life.
Merry Christmas to all. Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
It is the clarity of the bubble draws me in. I can see through it and beyond it, but stay fixed on it. I see it move through the water away from the source of the bubble, the faucet. I see so many different shapes. I see some so small and gentle that the bubble doesn’t last very long. I see some medium and big ones that move away from the source that seem to fade at different rates. The big ones that seem so strong, pop when I least expect it. The medium ones seem to feed off of the movement of the faucet and seem to actually acknowledge the need for the water source and seem to grow bigger and more and more full of purpose as they move away from the faucet. However, it seems that some can’t move away from the source without bursting. These bubbles seem to be without purpose.
Can it be that these bubbles are teaching me that I can’t really exist unless I know my purpose? I can be strong, but destroyed if I don’t feed off of the source of life. Leads me to question what is the purpose of my life? Is my life what it should be? What is it that I am supposed to be anyway?
I know at my core that I am supposed to be a wife and a mom. I’ve always known that about myself. I felt called to the vocation. That is the easy part of my journey. The extension of that call is what brings me the most pauses in my day. How do I make the most of that call? I so want to move through the water bringing calmness to the moment rather than bringing a storm to the moment. I want the bubbles to lead me.
I want to know that I can turn to something to lead me. The confusion in my life begins when I stop believing that there is a path. How often I look to the distortions in my life as the path instead of the source of the life in my life. I need to begin to focus on the bubbles that form in my life from the choices and the life of those that are attached to me as I move through my day.
How does this lead to my Christmas decorations? The circles of life always appear on the Christmas tree. Isn’t that what God wants? He seems to want us to focus on circles that never stop rather than lines that have an end point. He called us to a place that exits as a circle. He calls us to a life that begins and ends as best explained as the circle of life. He brings those things into our home most especially this Christmas season in the community I’ve built though the circle of people I invite into my home. He makes me acknowledge the bubbles in my life. He makes me acknowledge that the ornaments in my life define who I am. I can choose the ornaments and whether to display them or keep them hidden.
I pray the ornaments in my life allow me to expand my circle and lead me to true purpose of my life.
Merry Christmas to all. Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Art
The colors on page, the movement of an arm, the style of hair, the tone in a voice, or the words on a page seem to always draw me into the moment. Each of these allows me to see the expression of the moment that is more than the moment. My eye is turned toward these things in a way that is more interesting than if those things were not so significant.
I am thinking of the daring hairstyles of the designers of the dances that we so love. I see this so clearly on the show, So You Think You Can Dance. The styles are so interesting and not so expected. The hair is darker or brighter and more daring than what I am used to seeing in my world. It is like artwork in itself.
I always feel that way about my home. Each item that I display or the arrangement of the furniture is an opportunity to showcase the piece. I always know that each piece is not at its best without the other and its relationship to another piece creates the extra value. I also see this grace in the movement of dance. The dance is always better when there is more than one dancer. The individual dancer is complimented by the movement of the other dancer. The music increases the compliment even more. How can a dance be at its best without each of the components that makes it more than what it is in the head of the designer of the dance?
The dance is designed by one, decorated by an other, performed by yet another and each of these steps is what breathes life into the dance. The same is true for my home. I need the designer of each component to give me inspiration. I need the bones of the house to build the personality that exits. The colors of the walls are the finishing touches of the paintbrush given to this house. I need the canvas of the house to in order showcase the life that I have been given and the immediate essence that I need to express.
The change of a location of a chair or the color of a pillow allows me to change my focus and to change the personality of the room isn’t that so in my life? I so need to have the opportunity to take the bones that I have been given and to change the location or the focus of my moments to begin to develop the balance that is right for me to give to the world. I need to rest in those moments for a little or a long while, but also knowing that I can change the focus or the position of the things in my life as my life emerges.
For me it seems that I need each of the locations in my life to build my life to be the life that it is supposed to be while on earth. I have needed the struggles and the joys to truly unlock the truth of my life and to see beyond the dim light that I sometimes focus on to the bright light that leads to the truth. I need the various colors on a page, the fine-tuned tone of the voice in song, the arrangement of a composer of music, the artful arrangement of flowers in a vase. These are the things that make life more than song, more than the practical matters of life, into the life that gives true meaning.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen Borski
I am thinking of the daring hairstyles of the designers of the dances that we so love. I see this so clearly on the show, So You Think You Can Dance. The styles are so interesting and not so expected. The hair is darker or brighter and more daring than what I am used to seeing in my world. It is like artwork in itself.
I always feel that way about my home. Each item that I display or the arrangement of the furniture is an opportunity to showcase the piece. I always know that each piece is not at its best without the other and its relationship to another piece creates the extra value. I also see this grace in the movement of dance. The dance is always better when there is more than one dancer. The individual dancer is complimented by the movement of the other dancer. The music increases the compliment even more. How can a dance be at its best without each of the components that makes it more than what it is in the head of the designer of the dance?
The dance is designed by one, decorated by an other, performed by yet another and each of these steps is what breathes life into the dance. The same is true for my home. I need the designer of each component to give me inspiration. I need the bones of the house to build the personality that exits. The colors of the walls are the finishing touches of the paintbrush given to this house. I need the canvas of the house to in order showcase the life that I have been given and the immediate essence that I need to express.
The change of a location of a chair or the color of a pillow allows me to change my focus and to change the personality of the room isn’t that so in my life? I so need to have the opportunity to take the bones that I have been given and to change the location or the focus of my moments to begin to develop the balance that is right for me to give to the world. I need to rest in those moments for a little or a long while, but also knowing that I can change the focus or the position of the things in my life as my life emerges.
For me it seems that I need each of the locations in my life to build my life to be the life that it is supposed to be while on earth. I have needed the struggles and the joys to truly unlock the truth of my life and to see beyond the dim light that I sometimes focus on to the bright light that leads to the truth. I need the various colors on a page, the fine-tuned tone of the voice in song, the arrangement of a composer of music, the artful arrangement of flowers in a vase. These are the things that make life more than song, more than the practical matters of life, into the life that gives true meaning.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen Borski
Monday, November 23, 2009
The Wave In My Hair
I look back on the pictures of my youth and I know there are so many things in the picture, but the only thing I ever see is the wave in my hair. It seems so different from what I ever expected to look like. I always wanted to have thick, straight blond hair. I always wanted to look just like the other people in my family. I wanted to be petite and delicate. But that isn’t how it turned out.
I have a stature about me that isn’t to be compared to what I ever imagined. I have jet black hair (with a little gray I must admit) and amazingly the tiniest hands. I have big teeth and small lips. I have small ears, but big hips. Wow what a picture that paints in my mind. It seems so out of proportion.
It seems that I needed the combination that was given me to be the person that I am supposed to be. I just love leaning down and hugging my mother. It seems that I will break her when my stature reaches into her, but I never do. She seems to fit me just perfectly. It seems that the hug is so much better that I have to lean into it for it to exist
I have the opposite when I lean into hug my husband and my son. I must reach so high. It seems I’ll never get there but I always seem to make it. The hug is such a blessing when I get there. The warmth and calmness always overwhelms me that I can’t describe it.
Right now I’m thinking of the story of Goldilocks. I am looking for just the right match. The girl I am thinking about has thick, blonde hair (or for now brown). I am thinking of a girl that is just my height. The girl is strong-willed just like me. She has round cheeks just like me. She is from me. She is the fruit of my womb. I’m thinking of my beautiful daughter, Elizabeth.
Wow, I am so glad I thought of the wave in my hair today. I am so glad I have the wave in my hair as it makes me who I am. I am the product of my mother, the wife of my husband and the mother of two awesome children. Thank you God for the gift of my life. Happy Thanksgiving to God, and to all of the people of the world.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I have a stature about me that isn’t to be compared to what I ever imagined. I have jet black hair (with a little gray I must admit) and amazingly the tiniest hands. I have big teeth and small lips. I have small ears, but big hips. Wow what a picture that paints in my mind. It seems so out of proportion.
It seems that I needed the combination that was given me to be the person that I am supposed to be. I just love leaning down and hugging my mother. It seems that I will break her when my stature reaches into her, but I never do. She seems to fit me just perfectly. It seems that the hug is so much better that I have to lean into it for it to exist
I have the opposite when I lean into hug my husband and my son. I must reach so high. It seems I’ll never get there but I always seem to make it. The hug is such a blessing when I get there. The warmth and calmness always overwhelms me that I can’t describe it.
Right now I’m thinking of the story of Goldilocks. I am looking for just the right match. The girl I am thinking about has thick, blonde hair (or for now brown). I am thinking of a girl that is just my height. The girl is strong-willed just like me. She has round cheeks just like me. She is from me. She is the fruit of my womb. I’m thinking of my beautiful daughter, Elizabeth.
Wow, I am so glad I thought of the wave in my hair today. I am so glad I have the wave in my hair as it makes me who I am. I am the product of my mother, the wife of my husband and the mother of two awesome children. Thank you God for the gift of my life. Happy Thanksgiving to God, and to all of the people of the world.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Words
I've been thinking this morning about words and the impact of words on my life. There are so many words in my day. The written word, the word of God, the spoken word, the words on a sign, the words in my head, and the list goes on and on. I've also been thinking how those words when used in different forms or by different people have different meanings. What is it that makes a word have meaning anyway?
I depend on words so much. I need them to feed my body and my soul. What would the grocery store be like without words? How would I know what was inside the can or the box on the shelf? How would I pass along my favorite recipes without writing them down so that the process is duplicated so the same outcome emerges every time? Seems the dependence on the word is what gives it the meaning.
That dependence is something of interest to me. How am I really dependent on the words? Do the words define me or do I define the words? If I define the words, than is it that we all have our own perception of what the words mean? If so, how is it that communication can truly be good if all are defining there own words?
Well, I now think I should turn to the dictionary for clarification of the definition of these words in my head and on this page, but even when I read the dictionary, I carry all the things in my life in my head when I read the meaning. Therefore the meaning for me is never exactly the same as the meaning for someone else that reads the exact same passage in the dictionary. Or is it?
It seems that a simple word, such as book, would be the same for all who read the definition, but is it really? Is the definition of a book the same for book writers as it is for those that read the book. Seems that the writer looks at books as a means for getting something out of their minds onto a page or a screen, but the reader looks at a book as something to take into the mind.
Just some words that have been moving around in my head today, and I had to get them out. Maybe all this will become a book someday! Wonder how that would impact my life.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I depend on words so much. I need them to feed my body and my soul. What would the grocery store be like without words? How would I know what was inside the can or the box on the shelf? How would I pass along my favorite recipes without writing them down so that the process is duplicated so the same outcome emerges every time? Seems the dependence on the word is what gives it the meaning.
That dependence is something of interest to me. How am I really dependent on the words? Do the words define me or do I define the words? If I define the words, than is it that we all have our own perception of what the words mean? If so, how is it that communication can truly be good if all are defining there own words?
Well, I now think I should turn to the dictionary for clarification of the definition of these words in my head and on this page, but even when I read the dictionary, I carry all the things in my life in my head when I read the meaning. Therefore the meaning for me is never exactly the same as the meaning for someone else that reads the exact same passage in the dictionary. Or is it?
It seems that a simple word, such as book, would be the same for all who read the definition, but is it really? Is the definition of a book the same for book writers as it is for those that read the book. Seems that the writer looks at books as a means for getting something out of their minds onto a page or a screen, but the reader looks at a book as something to take into the mind.
Just some words that have been moving around in my head today, and I had to get them out. Maybe all this will become a book someday! Wonder how that would impact my life.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Saturday, November 14, 2009
A Compliment
How many times a day do we compliment others? I am always telling someone their hair, outfit, their home, or mood are so pleasing to me. It comes so naturally to see the beauty in others and in the world around me. The struggle I have is in complimenting myself, or in accepting myself for who I am right at that moment. I need not worry that I used to be skinny or that I want to more prayerful. While my health and my prayer life are important, I should never not love myself just as I am at the very moment I am living. God loves and accepts me just as I am in that minute.
I am challenging myself to compliment myself every day for the wonderful woman that God has created. I will call to mind a characteristic that is special about me. Today I am wondering if it is my laugh. I have a really good one. When one of the kids or my husband touches my funny bone I just can't stop. My laugh is loud and it is infectious. Actually, I can really deliver a funny line too. Just ask my daughter. She loves my stories about my day and the people I encounter. I can always bring laughter to her. I guess today I will compliment myself on my sense of humor, and thank God for giving me the gift of joy.
I also challenge myself after accepting the compliment to say a prayer that I not hide the gift, and that I share it with others. I pray that I continue to look at myself not in comparison to others, but as an individual gift from God with special gifts and talents that are unique to me and not like the ones that others have.
I look forward to discovering another compliment tomorrow. I'll close by saying, "You look marvelous darling..."
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I am challenging myself to compliment myself every day for the wonderful woman that God has created. I will call to mind a characteristic that is special about me. Today I am wondering if it is my laugh. I have a really good one. When one of the kids or my husband touches my funny bone I just can't stop. My laugh is loud and it is infectious. Actually, I can really deliver a funny line too. Just ask my daughter. She loves my stories about my day and the people I encounter. I can always bring laughter to her. I guess today I will compliment myself on my sense of humor, and thank God for giving me the gift of joy.
I also challenge myself after accepting the compliment to say a prayer that I not hide the gift, and that I share it with others. I pray that I continue to look at myself not in comparison to others, but as an individual gift from God with special gifts and talents that are unique to me and not like the ones that others have.
I look forward to discovering another compliment tomorrow. I'll close by saying, "You look marvelous darling..."
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Flower
I am sitting here thinking about every flower I’ve ever seen and the thought overwhelms me with the many colors I have experienced in my life. I am mostly thinking about the structure of a flower and how perfectly each is made. It makes me think about what type of flower I would be if I were a flower, or even what part of the flower I would be.
Would I be rose, a lily, a bird of paradise, a mum, a carnation, a daisy? Each of these flowers has a different character. The rose is so elegant and smells so sweet, but it is prone to disease and is easily beaten down by the rain. The lily is so beautiful, comes in so many colors with petals that open themselves up in a way that welcomes the world into there arms but the lily doesn’t last very long. The bird of paradise is so vibrant, has a strong stem, strives in a crowded spot, but only grows in a certain climate. The mum is so amazing. It is so consistent. It blooms so beautifully, but depends on us to remove the beautiful flowers from its crown immediately in order to provide a color show again. A carnation is not particularly beautiful, but it is dependable and allows itself to be filled with the colors of the world that are required at any given moment. The daisy is so beautiful, and withstands the test of time. The daisy has so many petals on each flower and the petals all look the same. Each petal is flat and the color is evenly distributed throughout each petal. The daisy is like the comfort food of flowers.
My mind now flows to the structure of a flower and the importance of each part. The roots are so important because the roots provide access to nutrients for the flower and are the basis for life for a flower. However, the stem is equally as important since it is the channel for the nutrients from the roots to be distributed to the entire flower. I think of the leaves as my hands extending themselves open to the Lord as I pray the Lord’s prayer every day. I mostly love the petals, or the color of the flower, as these to me are the true expression of its purpose in life.
I see the gifts I am given in the petals. The roots are required, because I always need food. The stem is required, as I always need the food to be delivered. I always need the leaves, because I always need to praise God through prayer. But I mostly see the petals or the color of a flower when I look at a flower. The petals are the fruit of life. Life can exist without the bloom because the plant will have purpose and will give off life without the bloom, but the bloom is required to add life to the flower.
The petals of a rose are most interesting to me, and the bloom of a bird of paradise never ceases to amaze me in its complexity and simplicity. Each component is expected, but always amazing. The blue stamen of bird of paradise is perfect. The blue takes my breath away each time I see it. It is so simple, but so complex. But I am mostly drawn to the perfection of the rose. Each rose petal has a gentleness to it that draws me in, but I can’t get to the petal unless I deal with the thorns of the rose stem. I am also entranced with the smell of a rose. It draws me in every time. The sweetness, the individuality, the perfection is so complete when I allow myself to walk past the roses in my yard without being distracted by the environment outside of the rose garden.
Again I am sitting here thinking of the flowers in my yard,and I am overwhelmed with the simple beauty of each petal that emerges as the day emerges and as I emerge into the woman I am to become. I like to think of myself as a blooming rose.
Talk to you again soon,
YSIC, Eileen
Would I be rose, a lily, a bird of paradise, a mum, a carnation, a daisy? Each of these flowers has a different character. The rose is so elegant and smells so sweet, but it is prone to disease and is easily beaten down by the rain. The lily is so beautiful, comes in so many colors with petals that open themselves up in a way that welcomes the world into there arms but the lily doesn’t last very long. The bird of paradise is so vibrant, has a strong stem, strives in a crowded spot, but only grows in a certain climate. The mum is so amazing. It is so consistent. It blooms so beautifully, but depends on us to remove the beautiful flowers from its crown immediately in order to provide a color show again. A carnation is not particularly beautiful, but it is dependable and allows itself to be filled with the colors of the world that are required at any given moment. The daisy is so beautiful, and withstands the test of time. The daisy has so many petals on each flower and the petals all look the same. Each petal is flat and the color is evenly distributed throughout each petal. The daisy is like the comfort food of flowers.
My mind now flows to the structure of a flower and the importance of each part. The roots are so important because the roots provide access to nutrients for the flower and are the basis for life for a flower. However, the stem is equally as important since it is the channel for the nutrients from the roots to be distributed to the entire flower. I think of the leaves as my hands extending themselves open to the Lord as I pray the Lord’s prayer every day. I mostly love the petals, or the color of the flower, as these to me are the true expression of its purpose in life.
I see the gifts I am given in the petals. The roots are required, because I always need food. The stem is required, as I always need the food to be delivered. I always need the leaves, because I always need to praise God through prayer. But I mostly see the petals or the color of a flower when I look at a flower. The petals are the fruit of life. Life can exist without the bloom because the plant will have purpose and will give off life without the bloom, but the bloom is required to add life to the flower.
The petals of a rose are most interesting to me, and the bloom of a bird of paradise never ceases to amaze me in its complexity and simplicity. Each component is expected, but always amazing. The blue stamen of bird of paradise is perfect. The blue takes my breath away each time I see it. It is so simple, but so complex. But I am mostly drawn to the perfection of the rose. Each rose petal has a gentleness to it that draws me in, but I can’t get to the petal unless I deal with the thorns of the rose stem. I am also entranced with the smell of a rose. It draws me in every time. The sweetness, the individuality, the perfection is so complete when I allow myself to walk past the roses in my yard without being distracted by the environment outside of the rose garden.
Again I am sitting here thinking of the flowers in my yard,and I am overwhelmed with the simple beauty of each petal that emerges as the day emerges and as I emerge into the woman I am to become. I like to think of myself as a blooming rose.
Talk to you again soon,
YSIC, Eileen
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Stress
Stress! It seems to consume me some times, and I wonder what makes it such an intense experience. I think if only it weren't so....[name it!], all would be OK. But is that really the answer? My life experience has proved otherwise. When [name it] happens it is not that it is happening that causes the stress, but how I respond to the [name it] that causes the stress. Holy acceptance of [name it] seems the real answer. I pray for that holy acceptance now. Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Eileen
Monday, November 9, 2009
Water
I am now thinking of water and its impact on life. Water is nothing and everything at the same time. It is without color and without flavor, but it is the description of life. It appers in so many different forms. It appears in the swimming pool outside my back door. It appears in the faucet in my kitchen. It appears in the clouds above me and it appears in the lakes, rivers and oceans surrounding me.
The first moment I thought to write about water today, I was holding a glass of water in my hand and I felt compelled to write about it, but quickly felt compelled to also write about glass. The glass I held in my hand was so clear it represented truth in my thoughts. I can see through it and nothing can be hidden by it. The next thought I had was that of strength. Glass is so strong to my grip and to the forces of nature such as wind and heat and moisture. Things can be so near to it, but can't penetrate it. That is an interesting thought. How many things in my life can be so close to me, but I don't allow them to truly permeate my existance? I build a wall around me. Perhaps I build a wall of glass!
My next thought is also connected to the strength of glass. It is so very strong, but also so weak at the same time. While I know that the glass can hold up against the wind, heat, moisture or even my grip, I also know that if I were to throw my glass to the ground it would shatter. Isn't that what I do in life so many times? I have a great gift. A gift that is clear, true and strong, and I throw it to the ground and shatter it when I allow my will to interfere with the true purpose of the gift?
I also think about the true purpose of water and of glass and see the its relationship to my life. Water gives life and takes it away. I need water to survive and enjoy it so much when I've worked so hard on a hot, summer day. It is so refreshing. It renews my body when I drink it in. On the opposite side, I also think of the destruction of water. I think of how storms emerge and send the city around us into turmoil. I see the results of flooding from the rainfall and the destruction to my city and of life when it takes control.
The same holds true of glass. Glass has so many uses. Some true and clear and some destructive. I can see glass in its most pure in a clear drinking glass, but also know that broken glass can be menacing. It can destroy the body when I step on it or pick it up with my bare hands. Isn't that also true when I turn back to things in my life that are broken instead of moving forward to the clarity and truth of the moment and to using the gifts that are given to me in the truest form instead of the broken form I may feel most comfortable with in life?
Water and glass are both so beautiful. The purpose of each is clear and true. These items hold the truth inside and represent a simple example of the truth I am to live in my life. The gifts I have are strong, but when handled with force I can break them. Sometimes the turmoil comes in a way that is the result of things outside of my control, such as rainfall, but I can choose to accept the rainfall and allow what emerges to be an extension of the gifts given to me or I can oppose the rainfall and throw my glass to the ground and deal with the many broken pieces around me.
Water is so refreshing, and glass is so clear. I pray that I stay focused on the refreshment and clarity in my life, but accept the rainfall and stay focused on the brokenness and my ability to allow it to consume me or to allow my life to emerge with an improved perspective resulting from the the storms and broken glass.
Boy that drink of water this morning was good. I can't wait to have another in a nice tall, clear glass.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
The first moment I thought to write about water today, I was holding a glass of water in my hand and I felt compelled to write about it, but quickly felt compelled to also write about glass. The glass I held in my hand was so clear it represented truth in my thoughts. I can see through it and nothing can be hidden by it. The next thought I had was that of strength. Glass is so strong to my grip and to the forces of nature such as wind and heat and moisture. Things can be so near to it, but can't penetrate it. That is an interesting thought. How many things in my life can be so close to me, but I don't allow them to truly permeate my existance? I build a wall around me. Perhaps I build a wall of glass!
My next thought is also connected to the strength of glass. It is so very strong, but also so weak at the same time. While I know that the glass can hold up against the wind, heat, moisture or even my grip, I also know that if I were to throw my glass to the ground it would shatter. Isn't that what I do in life so many times? I have a great gift. A gift that is clear, true and strong, and I throw it to the ground and shatter it when I allow my will to interfere with the true purpose of the gift?
I also think about the true purpose of water and of glass and see the its relationship to my life. Water gives life and takes it away. I need water to survive and enjoy it so much when I've worked so hard on a hot, summer day. It is so refreshing. It renews my body when I drink it in. On the opposite side, I also think of the destruction of water. I think of how storms emerge and send the city around us into turmoil. I see the results of flooding from the rainfall and the destruction to my city and of life when it takes control.
The same holds true of glass. Glass has so many uses. Some true and clear and some destructive. I can see glass in its most pure in a clear drinking glass, but also know that broken glass can be menacing. It can destroy the body when I step on it or pick it up with my bare hands. Isn't that also true when I turn back to things in my life that are broken instead of moving forward to the clarity and truth of the moment and to using the gifts that are given to me in the truest form instead of the broken form I may feel most comfortable with in life?
Water and glass are both so beautiful. The purpose of each is clear and true. These items hold the truth inside and represent a simple example of the truth I am to live in my life. The gifts I have are strong, but when handled with force I can break them. Sometimes the turmoil comes in a way that is the result of things outside of my control, such as rainfall, but I can choose to accept the rainfall and allow what emerges to be an extension of the gifts given to me or I can oppose the rainfall and throw my glass to the ground and deal with the many broken pieces around me.
Water is so refreshing, and glass is so clear. I pray that I stay focused on the refreshment and clarity in my life, but accept the rainfall and stay focused on the brokenness and my ability to allow it to consume me or to allow my life to emerge with an improved perspective resulting from the the storms and broken glass.
Boy that drink of water this morning was good. I can't wait to have another in a nice tall, clear glass.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Air
Breathe in, breathe out. It seems such a simple task. We all do it. Even those of us that need help with it do it so that we can live. I am so focused on it right now I can feel every breath I am taking, and now I am thinking how many times I never even notice my breath. I never even seem to realize the miracle of breathing.
Wow I am now thinking about what miracles I’ve seen today. At first the miracles are not so clear, but when I start to focus on the day the miracles emerge. I begin to see the connection to others and how that blooms into so many miracles. Isn’t it that I can only truly experience a day if I allow myself to settle into the day and breathe in all the moments and all the people that I meet during each day?
Isn’t it that I can only see the miracles if I allow myself to respect and honor those around me? I so many times am impressed with the results of the human person’s actions, but not impressed with the person. I can’t see beyond the object of beauty to understand that the person that created it is the real beauty. How detached I am from what is right in life.
I now think of the day and all that it brought to me and hopefully all that I brought to the day. I think of the artisans and the merchants I encountered today at a craft fair. Each brought something different to the event. Each had a different smile and a different laugh. Some had handicrafts of their own to sell and others had crafts made by the hands of another but had the gift of representing that artist in selling the crafts. One is not better than the other, but a complement of the other.
One if my favorite phrases these days is “Don’t forget we all have a different bag of tricks to share.” One is not better than the other, but neither is at its fullest with out the other bag of tricks. One is never complete unless the others in our lives are acknowledged and accepted for their individual gifts.
How simple it is to acknowledge other’s bag of tricks as a wonderful gift from God. How simple it is to acknowledge our own bag of tricks as a wonderful gift of God, but I sometimes forget to honor God and to thank God for such beautiful gifts. I sometimes get caught up in the things that “I think” are missing from my bag of tricks. I tend to forget to breathe in the life that is around me and I sometimes hold my breathe waiting for different gifts to land in my bag because I want the contents of the bag to change according to my will rather than God’s will.
I forget to breathe in and breathe out accepting each moment for what it is. I forget that the air around me is what keeps me alive. I pray that I continue to grow in my acceptance and understanding of living the moment that I am in right now and that I just breathe the air around me every minute that God gives to me and that I never forget the miracle of breathing in and breathing out.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Wow I am now thinking about what miracles I’ve seen today. At first the miracles are not so clear, but when I start to focus on the day the miracles emerge. I begin to see the connection to others and how that blooms into so many miracles. Isn’t it that I can only truly experience a day if I allow myself to settle into the day and breathe in all the moments and all the people that I meet during each day?
Isn’t it that I can only see the miracles if I allow myself to respect and honor those around me? I so many times am impressed with the results of the human person’s actions, but not impressed with the person. I can’t see beyond the object of beauty to understand that the person that created it is the real beauty. How detached I am from what is right in life.
I now think of the day and all that it brought to me and hopefully all that I brought to the day. I think of the artisans and the merchants I encountered today at a craft fair. Each brought something different to the event. Each had a different smile and a different laugh. Some had handicrafts of their own to sell and others had crafts made by the hands of another but had the gift of representing that artist in selling the crafts. One is not better than the other, but a complement of the other.
One if my favorite phrases these days is “Don’t forget we all have a different bag of tricks to share.” One is not better than the other, but neither is at its fullest with out the other bag of tricks. One is never complete unless the others in our lives are acknowledged and accepted for their individual gifts.
How simple it is to acknowledge other’s bag of tricks as a wonderful gift from God. How simple it is to acknowledge our own bag of tricks as a wonderful gift of God, but I sometimes forget to honor God and to thank God for such beautiful gifts. I sometimes get caught up in the things that “I think” are missing from my bag of tricks. I tend to forget to breathe in the life that is around me and I sometimes hold my breathe waiting for different gifts to land in my bag because I want the contents of the bag to change according to my will rather than God’s will.
I forget to breathe in and breathe out accepting each moment for what it is. I forget that the air around me is what keeps me alive. I pray that I continue to grow in my acceptance and understanding of living the moment that I am in right now and that I just breathe the air around me every minute that God gives to me and that I never forget the miracle of breathing in and breathing out.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Values
Every day is a series of choices that make me a better person (I hope.). I always try to acknowledge the other person, but so many times I focus on myself and the relationship with the other person rather than the other person and the relationship to me. It is in this relationship that I can start to understand what my life should be. Or at least that is what my fingers are telling me as I type these words.
Do I really get that it is the other person that makes me who I am supposed to be in this life? I am never complete without relationship, and a relationship is never complete without others in the mix that are fully in the relationship. It can’t be that someone is partially in a relationship and still be fully committed to the relationship.
I think of this in the context of my relationship with the Lord. Can I truly be in the relationship if I am holding something back from the relationship? It seems a confusing point to me. I can always be in a relationship, but never fully receiving the grace that God intended if I continually place a barrier between me and the wall of choices in front of me.
I need to focus on the choice of living life with God at the center of my life or with God as only a part of my life. The choice is mine to make. I need to only make it so that my values lead me in life rather than control my life.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Do I really get that it is the other person that makes me who I am supposed to be in this life? I am never complete without relationship, and a relationship is never complete without others in the mix that are fully in the relationship. It can’t be that someone is partially in a relationship and still be fully committed to the relationship.
I think of this in the context of my relationship with the Lord. Can I truly be in the relationship if I am holding something back from the relationship? It seems a confusing point to me. I can always be in a relationship, but never fully receiving the grace that God intended if I continually place a barrier between me and the wall of choices in front of me.
I need to focus on the choice of living life with God at the center of my life or with God as only a part of my life. The choice is mine to make. I need to only make it so that my values lead me in life rather than control my life.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Forgiveness
Forgiveness is such a strong emotion. It leads us down so many paths. It leads me away from good and it leads me to good. It can be granted and it can be withheld. It can be ignored and it can be acknowledged. It is powerful and it is nothing.
I always wonder how many times I let forgiveness rule my life. I think of the times that I spend in my life not fully experiencing it because I was holding on to some hurt in my life that should be released through forgiveness. I think of the times that I’ve burdened someone by not accepting forgiveness or mostly by not even thinking that I needed to be forgiven for some action that hurt another.
Oh how many times I’ve been so caught up in myself that I don’t even see the other person’s need. How does that happen? There is always another perspective to the reality I am living. There is always someone else’s reality. The reality always consists of how the situation affected the other and how I don’t see that reality because I am clouded by the reality I am experiencing.
Am I doing it right now? Am I writing about the reality of my thoughts without acknowledging the thoughts of those reading this blog? Hopefully not, but I know in my intellect that I can only acknowledge that the thoughts of others exist, but know that I can’t truly consider the thoughts as I can’t ever really know them in total because I can’t experience them in the truest form. The thoughts can only be fully experienced by the one thinking the thoughts.
How does that relate to forgiveness? Forgiveness is taken in the perspective of the others participating in the forgiveness. My thoughts play a role in that forgiveness. Forgiveness can rule one’s life for good or bad. Forgiveness takes action on my part in acknowledging I need to give it and I need to accept it. Forgiveness if withheld or blocked leads me away from good and forgiveness if accepted and given leads me toward good.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I always wonder how many times I let forgiveness rule my life. I think of the times that I spend in my life not fully experiencing it because I was holding on to some hurt in my life that should be released through forgiveness. I think of the times that I’ve burdened someone by not accepting forgiveness or mostly by not even thinking that I needed to be forgiven for some action that hurt another.
Oh how many times I’ve been so caught up in myself that I don’t even see the other person’s need. How does that happen? There is always another perspective to the reality I am living. There is always someone else’s reality. The reality always consists of how the situation affected the other and how I don’t see that reality because I am clouded by the reality I am experiencing.
Am I doing it right now? Am I writing about the reality of my thoughts without acknowledging the thoughts of those reading this blog? Hopefully not, but I know in my intellect that I can only acknowledge that the thoughts of others exist, but know that I can’t truly consider the thoughts as I can’t ever really know them in total because I can’t experience them in the truest form. The thoughts can only be fully experienced by the one thinking the thoughts.
How does that relate to forgiveness? Forgiveness is taken in the perspective of the others participating in the forgiveness. My thoughts play a role in that forgiveness. Forgiveness can rule one’s life for good or bad. Forgiveness takes action on my part in acknowledging I need to give it and I need to accept it. Forgiveness if withheld or blocked leads me away from good and forgiveness if accepted and given leads me toward good.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Celebrate
I sit here staring at the floor and the TV stand and wonder what the purpose of each is in this day that I am experiencing. Both depend on each other, and the one can’t have purpose without the other. The stand is so functional in its purpose to hold up the television, but doesn’t the floor have the same purpose?
The floor is the beginning of the house. It defines the shape, or the form, of the house. The house can’t be what it is without the foundation. However, the foundation has no purpose unless the floor, the walls, and the TV stand, for that matter, don’t exist.
Isn’t that true of everything? Nothing exists without the other that exists because or around the other items that support it or enhance it. That is so true of our lives. We can’t believe in or know the truth of anything unless we explore and at least begin to look to the form of something.
A triangle that we know on a piece of paper is but the form of some perfect triangle created by God, or more clearly the foundation of some triangle that exists to support all triangles to follow. For that matter, the triangle can’t exist unless the line exists that supports each side of the triangle. Each side without the other is only a portion of the potential or the form of what it can be when combined with the other portions or potentials of the other lines.
In our world we take the forms that support the reality of our material representation of our world of existence and use them as a mirror to the perfect form presented to us by our loving God. We do that with the love that we experience in our families. Our love is but the material reality of the true form of love presented to each one of us by God.
Our family love is intense, special and deep, but it is only an experience of the love that we can know through the love of God. This love is only the foundation that we can build upon to understand the love that God has for each and every one of us as individuals and in community. It is but a foreshadowing of the love that God has for us, and is most humanly perfected in the marital love of a man and woman that results in creation.
God must love us so much by trusting us to create life with an eternal soul. That is something to celebrate.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
The floor is the beginning of the house. It defines the shape, or the form, of the house. The house can’t be what it is without the foundation. However, the foundation has no purpose unless the floor, the walls, and the TV stand, for that matter, don’t exist.
Isn’t that true of everything? Nothing exists without the other that exists because or around the other items that support it or enhance it. That is so true of our lives. We can’t believe in or know the truth of anything unless we explore and at least begin to look to the form of something.
A triangle that we know on a piece of paper is but the form of some perfect triangle created by God, or more clearly the foundation of some triangle that exists to support all triangles to follow. For that matter, the triangle can’t exist unless the line exists that supports each side of the triangle. Each side without the other is only a portion of the potential or the form of what it can be when combined with the other portions or potentials of the other lines.
In our world we take the forms that support the reality of our material representation of our world of existence and use them as a mirror to the perfect form presented to us by our loving God. We do that with the love that we experience in our families. Our love is but the material reality of the true form of love presented to each one of us by God.
Our family love is intense, special and deep, but it is only an experience of the love that we can know through the love of God. This love is only the foundation that we can build upon to understand the love that God has for each and every one of us as individuals and in community. It is but a foreshadowing of the love that God has for us, and is most humanly perfected in the marital love of a man and woman that results in creation.
God must love us so much by trusting us to create life with an eternal soul. That is something to celebrate.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Monday, October 26, 2009
One Day at A Time
I have been contemplating what causes stress in my life, and mostly it emerges when I don’t feel like I have things under control. What does “under control” really mean? Do I ever really have things under control anyway?
I can plan a personal project like hosting a party or a business matter like facilitating a meeting or gathering data to analyze the cash flow of a project, and while I can list things out and try to anticipate the amount of time it will require, it never seems to work out the way I planned. Sometimes it takes less time, but often it takes more time than expected.
Sometimes I feel I must do something at a certain time and day, but when things don’t turn out that way it doesn’t even seem to matter. What comes to mind when I consider this is the “need” to go to the grocery store. It seems I have it on my to do list for the day because I am out of everything, but then I don’t get the chance to go and somehow I always seem to pull a rabbit out of the hat and have something to make a nice meal at the end of the day.
So it seems I really didn’t need to go to the grocery store after all, but likely wanted to go because I was out of some favorite thing that I like to have on hand such as extra sharp cheddar cheese (Yum!). How often do we confuse wants with needs and plans as must follow agendas when sometimes the best things in life come without plans and when we focus less on our wants and more on what is around us already.
I remember so many times when I was at the bottom of the pantry, and didn’t have time (or didn’t want to make the time) to go to the grocery and the I fixed Blue Runner red beans with rice and a vegetable on the side. This is now one of my family’s favorite meals. It is such a simple and quick meal to fix and now has come to symbolize comfort food in my home.
I pray ….
That I allow plans to exist, but not dictate,
That I allow life to happen instead of worrying about what will happen next,
That I allow my needs to be the focus rather than my wants,
That I can escape the stress by yielding to rather than trying to control,
And that I always live each day with a sense of joy.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I can plan a personal project like hosting a party or a business matter like facilitating a meeting or gathering data to analyze the cash flow of a project, and while I can list things out and try to anticipate the amount of time it will require, it never seems to work out the way I planned. Sometimes it takes less time, but often it takes more time than expected.
Sometimes I feel I must do something at a certain time and day, but when things don’t turn out that way it doesn’t even seem to matter. What comes to mind when I consider this is the “need” to go to the grocery store. It seems I have it on my to do list for the day because I am out of everything, but then I don’t get the chance to go and somehow I always seem to pull a rabbit out of the hat and have something to make a nice meal at the end of the day.
So it seems I really didn’t need to go to the grocery store after all, but likely wanted to go because I was out of some favorite thing that I like to have on hand such as extra sharp cheddar cheese (Yum!). How often do we confuse wants with needs and plans as must follow agendas when sometimes the best things in life come without plans and when we focus less on our wants and more on what is around us already.
I remember so many times when I was at the bottom of the pantry, and didn’t have time (or didn’t want to make the time) to go to the grocery and the I fixed Blue Runner red beans with rice and a vegetable on the side. This is now one of my family’s favorite meals. It is such a simple and quick meal to fix and now has come to symbolize comfort food in my home.
I pray ….
That I allow plans to exist, but not dictate,
That I allow life to happen instead of worrying about what will happen next,
That I allow my needs to be the focus rather than my wants,
That I can escape the stress by yielding to rather than trying to control,
And that I always live each day with a sense of joy.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
One Day at a Time
I have been contemplating what causes stress in my life, and mostly it emerges when I don’t feel like I have things under control. What does “under control” really mean? Do I ever really have things under control anyway?
I can plan a personal project like hosting a party or a business matter like facilitating a meeting or gathering data to analyze the cash flow of a project, and while I can list things out and try to anticipate the amount of time it will require, it never seems to work out the way I planned. Sometimes it takes less time, but often it takes more time than expected.
Sometimes I feel I must do something at a certain time and day, but when things don’t turn out that way it doesn’t even seem to matter. What comes to mind when I consider this is the “need” to go to the grocery store. It seems I have it on my to do list for the day because I am out of everything, but then I don’t get the chance to go and somehow I always seem to pull a rabbit out of the hat and have something to make a nice meal at the end of the day.
So it seems I really didn’t need to go to the grocery store after all, but likely wanted to go because I was out of some favorite thing that I like to have on hand such as extra sharp cheddar cheese (Yum!). How often do we confuse wants with needs and plans as must follow agendas when sometimes the best things in life come without plans and when we focus less on our wants and more on what is around us already.
I remember so many times when I was at the bottom of the pantry one day, and didn’t have time (or didn’t want to make the time) to go to the grocery and the I fixed Blue Runner red beans with rice and a vegetable on the side. This is now one of my family’s favorite meals. It is such a simple and quick meal to fix and now has come to symbolize comfort food in my home.
I pray ….
That I allow plans to exist, but not dictate,
That I allow life to happen instead of worrying about what will happen next,
That I allow my needs to be the focus rather than my wants,
That I can escape the stress by yielding to rather than trying to control,
And that I always live each day with a sense of joy.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I can plan a personal project like hosting a party or a business matter like facilitating a meeting or gathering data to analyze the cash flow of a project, and while I can list things out and try to anticipate the amount of time it will require, it never seems to work out the way I planned. Sometimes it takes less time, but often it takes more time than expected.
Sometimes I feel I must do something at a certain time and day, but when things don’t turn out that way it doesn’t even seem to matter. What comes to mind when I consider this is the “need” to go to the grocery store. It seems I have it on my to do list for the day because I am out of everything, but then I don’t get the chance to go and somehow I always seem to pull a rabbit out of the hat and have something to make a nice meal at the end of the day.
So it seems I really didn’t need to go to the grocery store after all, but likely wanted to go because I was out of some favorite thing that I like to have on hand such as extra sharp cheddar cheese (Yum!). How often do we confuse wants with needs and plans as must follow agendas when sometimes the best things in life come without plans and when we focus less on our wants and more on what is around us already.
I remember so many times when I was at the bottom of the pantry one day, and didn’t have time (or didn’t want to make the time) to go to the grocery and the I fixed Blue Runner red beans with rice and a vegetable on the side. This is now one of my family’s favorite meals. It is such a simple and quick meal to fix and now has come to symbolize comfort food in my home.
I pray ….
That I allow plans to exist, but not dictate,
That I allow life to happen instead of worrying about what will happen next,
That I allow my needs to be the focus rather than my wants,
That I can escape the stress by yielding to rather than trying to control,
And that I always live each day with a sense of joy.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Sunday, October 25, 2009
The Rose
I cut some roses today, and that always makes me smile. The rose is such a perfect example of complexity and simplicity. The rose is always the same but somehow always different. For me the rose always draws me in to its presence. I so love the smell. I can’t walk away.
The smell of a rose inspires so many things. It is at its core, the symbol of love. Roses are always included in the celebration of love. I can’t even think of Valentine’s Day without thinking of a bouquet of a dozen red roses. I can’t even imagine a florist shop without several dozen roses in the cooler ready to be arranged in a special way for some special woman.
This makes me think of the difference in the roles of men and women. Isn’t it the man that generally presents the bouquet of roses to the women? And isn’t it a woman that generally arranges the bouquet to sell to the man to present to the woman? What an awesome picture that paints in my mind.
The picture is of the dance between a man and a woman in love. The man wants to honor the woman’s beauty by presenting her with something as beautiful as a rose. It is generally not just one rose but many to show his expression of the vastness of her beauty and of his love for her, but he depends on a woman to interpret that love so that the arrangement can perfectly express his love for the woman that he will give the flowers to as a gift.
Isn’t this the dance of life? Isn’t this what dance is? I can dance alone, but it is at its best when done with Jeff. I need is presence to fully accept the movement of the music. Something is missing if I don’t allow myself to be part of his movement.
I need every other person in my life to fully express myself. I need the dance and the connection to others and to nature to be fully complete. I need to smile. I need to understand the complexity and simplicity of the moment in order to move to the next moment. I can’t truly be in that moment without the love that I have with Jeff.
Have I forgotten that this blog is about a rose? Now that I think of it, I have not. Life cannot be without the smells, beauty and thorns of the life which is exactly like a rose. Roses aren’t beautiful unless the smell draws you into the beauty, and the rose isn’t perfect unless the thorns protect and enhance that beauty. I feel that way too. I am who I am through the presence of me that draws others in, but it is the beauty that is developed through the thorns of my life that make me complete and that keep me humble and truly a good person that is connected to all of the people in my circle and beyond.
Thank you God for the roses in my backyard and for the people in my life that are all such individual, beautiful roses that continue to draw me in to know that person and for the appreciation of each and every petal and thorn that every one of us accepts in our lives.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
The smell of a rose inspires so many things. It is at its core, the symbol of love. Roses are always included in the celebration of love. I can’t even think of Valentine’s Day without thinking of a bouquet of a dozen red roses. I can’t even imagine a florist shop without several dozen roses in the cooler ready to be arranged in a special way for some special woman.
This makes me think of the difference in the roles of men and women. Isn’t it the man that generally presents the bouquet of roses to the women? And isn’t it a woman that generally arranges the bouquet to sell to the man to present to the woman? What an awesome picture that paints in my mind.
The picture is of the dance between a man and a woman in love. The man wants to honor the woman’s beauty by presenting her with something as beautiful as a rose. It is generally not just one rose but many to show his expression of the vastness of her beauty and of his love for her, but he depends on a woman to interpret that love so that the arrangement can perfectly express his love for the woman that he will give the flowers to as a gift.
Isn’t this the dance of life? Isn’t this what dance is? I can dance alone, but it is at its best when done with Jeff. I need is presence to fully accept the movement of the music. Something is missing if I don’t allow myself to be part of his movement.
I need every other person in my life to fully express myself. I need the dance and the connection to others and to nature to be fully complete. I need to smile. I need to understand the complexity and simplicity of the moment in order to move to the next moment. I can’t truly be in that moment without the love that I have with Jeff.
Have I forgotten that this blog is about a rose? Now that I think of it, I have not. Life cannot be without the smells, beauty and thorns of the life which is exactly like a rose. Roses aren’t beautiful unless the smell draws you into the beauty, and the rose isn’t perfect unless the thorns protect and enhance that beauty. I feel that way too. I am who I am through the presence of me that draws others in, but it is the beauty that is developed through the thorns of my life that make me complete and that keep me humble and truly a good person that is connected to all of the people in my circle and beyond.
Thank you God for the roses in my backyard and for the people in my life that are all such individual, beautiful roses that continue to draw me in to know that person and for the appreciation of each and every petal and thorn that every one of us accepts in our lives.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Candles
Oh how I love a candle and hate a candle. The beauty of the flame is so enticing and so powerful. I can’t seem to walk away from a candle in a store. A candle always smells so good and is generally so powerful. The colors are vibrant and the scents always draw me into the moment.
I was looking at a candle today and it was so very interesting. The candle was a big thick candle with lots of texture on the outside and the scent was inviting and inviting. It had the scent of the fall and of family. It reminded me of the scents of preparing for Thanksgiving. There was the scent of cinnamon and pumpkin mixed at just the right levels.
The scent draws me in every time. I always wonder if it is the scent or the events surrounding the scent that draw me in to the candle. The initial reaction is the scent, but when I allow the scent to take over memories flow through my mind that captivate me and require me to stay in the moment surrounding the memory.
The interesting thing is that I am so very allergic to the scent of candles. My intellect tells me to stay away, but my heart draws me in every time. How that is true in so many instances in my life.
What is it that draws me to something, but also turns me away from it? It seems the surface usually draws me in. Isn’t that why my focus is on the outside, the part of my life that others see instead of what really matters, the inside? The outside of me isn’t what is important. The scent of me is what is important. The scent comes from the inside. The surface is only the magnet.
I can only be a true Christian if the outside and the inside are both about the truth and balance each other like a candle. Even if I want to turn away, I can’t. The candle only smells good if the scent matches the truth or character of the candle. I love it when that matches up. I only turn away from the candle when the scent is too strong and it doesn’t match the shape or character of the candle. However, I can’t ignore the candle no matter the scent.
As I continue to dive into my thoughts, it seems that everything leads to the truth no matter the subject. Food leads to truth along with colors and kitchens and dance and art and children and grandchildren and even candles.
I pray I continue to see the truth in everything.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I was looking at a candle today and it was so very interesting. The candle was a big thick candle with lots of texture on the outside and the scent was inviting and inviting. It had the scent of the fall and of family. It reminded me of the scents of preparing for Thanksgiving. There was the scent of cinnamon and pumpkin mixed at just the right levels.
The scent draws me in every time. I always wonder if it is the scent or the events surrounding the scent that draw me in to the candle. The initial reaction is the scent, but when I allow the scent to take over memories flow through my mind that captivate me and require me to stay in the moment surrounding the memory.
The interesting thing is that I am so very allergic to the scent of candles. My intellect tells me to stay away, but my heart draws me in every time. How that is true in so many instances in my life.
What is it that draws me to something, but also turns me away from it? It seems the surface usually draws me in. Isn’t that why my focus is on the outside, the part of my life that others see instead of what really matters, the inside? The outside of me isn’t what is important. The scent of me is what is important. The scent comes from the inside. The surface is only the magnet.
I can only be a true Christian if the outside and the inside are both about the truth and balance each other like a candle. Even if I want to turn away, I can’t. The candle only smells good if the scent matches the truth or character of the candle. I love it when that matches up. I only turn away from the candle when the scent is too strong and it doesn’t match the shape or character of the candle. However, I can’t ignore the candle no matter the scent.
As I continue to dive into my thoughts, it seems that everything leads to the truth no matter the subject. Food leads to truth along with colors and kitchens and dance and art and children and grandchildren and even candles.
I pray I continue to see the truth in everything.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Red
I am sitting here in my red kitchen. I’ve had 4 houses and several apartments in my 22 years of marriage to Jeff, and I’ve had a red kitchen in each of these homes. Red to me is such a wonderful color. It is so full of life and energy which are constants for me in my kitchen. Isn’t color and food the heart of life? Color is in everything. It is in the clouds I look at every day, it is in the food I eat, it is in the clothes that I wear and in the television I watch.
I love to enjoy the colors of food most especially. The color of a yellow or red pepper is so crisp and complete. It looks so fresh that it pulls me in every time. I buy the pepper, and then plan the meal around it. I can’t wait to see the pop of color on the plate. The food always tastes better when the color is right. It makes my day when all of the color and flavors line up so beautifully.
I also love the taste and smell of strawberries. The sweetness draws me in every time. But I’ll be honest for a lot of years I wouldn’t eat strawberries because of the texture of the skin. That is so interesting. I avoided something so wonderful and sweet because of the outside. Oh, how often does that manifest itself in my life!
Subdivisions seem to make this all too real but in reverse. On the surface, my life is so the same as all of my neighbors. I have what they have, and they have what I have. All of us have a nice home, two or three cars, a dog or cat or two, nice clothes and dinner every night. But I always wonder what is different. What goes on inside of these houses that are different? I know each family has a different dynamic and a different personality, but it seems we don’t make that the focus of our external world. It seems at least to me that the focus is always on being the same.
What does this all have to do with my red kitchen? I guess it is that I want my home, my heart, to be the same no matter where I am, but at the same time I want to show some of that personality that others may not see on the surface of me. What is it in me that wants the kitchen to be so bold and to me so inviting? I so want people to be drawn to it as it is the heart of my home. It is the heart of life as it is where the food for my family is stored and served.
The heart of Jesus is the heart of life and it is red with the blood of Christ and it is also where the food for His family is stored and served. It is the life that draws us together every day. Is that why I painted my kitchen red? I hope so, but I never thought of it in that way before. Isn’t it life, energy and food that give us all purpose? The life and blood of Christ is the answer that draws me in every time, and now I know that my kitchen reminds me of that reality even when I don’t realize it.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I love to enjoy the colors of food most especially. The color of a yellow or red pepper is so crisp and complete. It looks so fresh that it pulls me in every time. I buy the pepper, and then plan the meal around it. I can’t wait to see the pop of color on the plate. The food always tastes better when the color is right. It makes my day when all of the color and flavors line up so beautifully.
I also love the taste and smell of strawberries. The sweetness draws me in every time. But I’ll be honest for a lot of years I wouldn’t eat strawberries because of the texture of the skin. That is so interesting. I avoided something so wonderful and sweet because of the outside. Oh, how often does that manifest itself in my life!
Subdivisions seem to make this all too real but in reverse. On the surface, my life is so the same as all of my neighbors. I have what they have, and they have what I have. All of us have a nice home, two or three cars, a dog or cat or two, nice clothes and dinner every night. But I always wonder what is different. What goes on inside of these houses that are different? I know each family has a different dynamic and a different personality, but it seems we don’t make that the focus of our external world. It seems at least to me that the focus is always on being the same.
What does this all have to do with my red kitchen? I guess it is that I want my home, my heart, to be the same no matter where I am, but at the same time I want to show some of that personality that others may not see on the surface of me. What is it in me that wants the kitchen to be so bold and to me so inviting? I so want people to be drawn to it as it is the heart of my home. It is the heart of life as it is where the food for my family is stored and served.
The heart of Jesus is the heart of life and it is red with the blood of Christ and it is also where the food for His family is stored and served. It is the life that draws us together every day. Is that why I painted my kitchen red? I hope so, but I never thought of it in that way before. Isn’t it life, energy and food that give us all purpose? The life and blood of Christ is the answer that draws me in every time, and now I know that my kitchen reminds me of that reality even when I don’t realize it.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Driving
I drive to work each day and it takes me about one hour to get there. It gives me time to pray and to connect to the world around me. I watch the same people drive the same way at the same time each day. It makes me think about the benefits and down falls of living in a big city. I think about how God must feel when I try to talk to Him.
I see the freeway in His mind and how it intersects like a spider web that is so beautiful to Him, but to the human eye is so confusing. Where do I turn today? I think about which fork in the road is the right one to take today. He knows that He can make good of all the forks, but I still always wonder if I’ve taken the right one or not.
The web of life is so interesting in that it allows me to grow into my own skin. The choices I made create a web that is interesting and unique to me. The same applies to all of us. It allows me to accept who I am and what choices I’ve made in this life.
Isn’t that what God does? Doesn’t He always accept me where I am on the journey? He allows me to grow in my love for Him, in my love for others and my love for myself. He may ask more of me than I can give at the moment, but He never stops loving me if I can’t give it right at that moment. He allows the seed to be watered by Him, by the others He puts in my life and by me and my life experiences.
He waits patiently as I figure out the web that I’ve created for myself. He allows me to come to Him at my own pace and in as much traffic as I create for myself on this freeway of life. He allows me to drive the freeways at my own pace, but He created so many people on the freeway that connect to me and allow me to see Him so that I can become the person He wants me to be.
Oh how grateful I am to be on the freeway of life that allows me the hour each day to reflect on God’s love for me.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I see the freeway in His mind and how it intersects like a spider web that is so beautiful to Him, but to the human eye is so confusing. Where do I turn today? I think about which fork in the road is the right one to take today. He knows that He can make good of all the forks, but I still always wonder if I’ve taken the right one or not.
The web of life is so interesting in that it allows me to grow into my own skin. The choices I made create a web that is interesting and unique to me. The same applies to all of us. It allows me to accept who I am and what choices I’ve made in this life.
Isn’t that what God does? Doesn’t He always accept me where I am on the journey? He allows me to grow in my love for Him, in my love for others and my love for myself. He may ask more of me than I can give at the moment, but He never stops loving me if I can’t give it right at that moment. He allows the seed to be watered by Him, by the others He puts in my life and by me and my life experiences.
He waits patiently as I figure out the web that I’ve created for myself. He allows me to come to Him at my own pace and in as much traffic as I create for myself on this freeway of life. He allows me to drive the freeways at my own pace, but He created so many people on the freeway that connect to me and allow me to see Him so that I can become the person He wants me to be.
Oh how grateful I am to be on the freeway of life that allows me the hour each day to reflect on God’s love for me.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Winning
Oh how good it feels to win a race, to be the one that finishes an exam first, or be the most recently promoted at work. I always seem to want that next rung on the ladder. I want to always be moving forward in what it means to be a winner. I wonder why I am that way.
I won’t gain a better life through winning. I’m still a good person even if I lose, but I am better person through my connection to the people in the race. I learn something in winning and in losing. However, I am still always trying to win the next thing.
This also leads me to think about what it really means to win. Isn’t winning about separating yourself from the others in the race? But I keep thinking that the race has no value if there aren’t any people to race against. It now seems to me that I am only a winner of a race if I am connected to the people that lost the race rather than being truly separated from them. So maybe the real winners are the ones that sacrifice for the one that leads the pack.
Sometimes I am gifted by God to be the one pulling the others through the race, and sometimes I am gifted by God to be the one pushing the winner to the victory. This last statement is most obvious to me in my role as a mother. How many times I pushed my children to achieve some task that I know will help them make better decisions later in life and ultimately better people. I pray that I’ve not pushed them to achieve things that don’t have that as the end result.
My thought now is that I want my children to achieve the next rung of their life, most especially their spiritual journey. But isn’t everything connected their, to my, spiritual journey? That seems to be the reason I want to always be moving forward, pushing others forward, and the things in life that are considered accomplishments are just a proxy or practice for the thing that I should really be trying to achieve - Holiness.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I won’t gain a better life through winning. I’m still a good person even if I lose, but I am better person through my connection to the people in the race. I learn something in winning and in losing. However, I am still always trying to win the next thing.
This also leads me to think about what it really means to win. Isn’t winning about separating yourself from the others in the race? But I keep thinking that the race has no value if there aren’t any people to race against. It now seems to me that I am only a winner of a race if I am connected to the people that lost the race rather than being truly separated from them. So maybe the real winners are the ones that sacrifice for the one that leads the pack.
Sometimes I am gifted by God to be the one pulling the others through the race, and sometimes I am gifted by God to be the one pushing the winner to the victory. This last statement is most obvious to me in my role as a mother. How many times I pushed my children to achieve some task that I know will help them make better decisions later in life and ultimately better people. I pray that I’ve not pushed them to achieve things that don’t have that as the end result.
My thought now is that I want my children to achieve the next rung of their life, most especially their spiritual journey. But isn’t everything connected their, to my, spiritual journey? That seems to be the reason I want to always be moving forward, pushing others forward, and the things in life that are considered accomplishments are just a proxy or practice for the thing that I should really be trying to achieve - Holiness.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Death
Today I seemed consumed with death and what that means to me and to all of the people in my life. Death is a given for all of us but somehow I don’t want to experience it just yet. I hold on to the life that I have before me now as it is so familiar. I know what to expect to some extent.
I know I will wake up tomorrow and the sun will shine. I will eat, I will clean, I will pray, I will think about what it is I am supposed to give to the world in this day. I so want to be open to and to do God’s will. I am always wondering if I am actually doing it or not.
I want a clear picture about what it is I am supposed to do in this life. I want it to be as clear as the sun or the moon. Those things are so constant, but now that I think of it these things are truly different each day. The moon has a different shape each day and the sun shines different colors each day. The angle in which I enjoy the sun and the moon changes throughout the day. Sometimes if the weather is bad I even have trouble seeing the sun or the moon.
What does that represent to me about death? I see the constancy of death in the rising and setting of the sun and the difference in death in the various ways I experience life by looking at things from a different angle. Sometimes I fill my heart with clouds and rain storms, and I can’t even see what I am supposed to see.
How will I be prepared for death, if I am not always molding myself to see beyond the clouds and rain in my life to enjoy each and every minute that I have now and forever. I want to be more patient as I grow to understand that I have eternity and that death is but a window into understanding that eternity truly exists. I seem to always wonder about the unknown of death and how it will make me different.
I know in my intellect that there is something more in this world than what I know now, but sometimes in my heart I still have doubt and wonder what I can do better that makes that doubt disappear. However, I also think that maybe I am always supposed to have that doubt so that I never take for granted what I have in the here and now before me.
I try to live in the now and not worry about what has passed as it is gone now and actually may be remembered by others very differently than how I remember it. I try not worry about the future as it is not here yet and may never actually be what I expected anyway.
It is a given that this minute I will be in this minute whether I want to or not and the next minute is always unknown. I pray that I live the minute how God intended and not be consumed with what is next whether it be life in death or another minute of life on earth.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
I know I will wake up tomorrow and the sun will shine. I will eat, I will clean, I will pray, I will think about what it is I am supposed to give to the world in this day. I so want to be open to and to do God’s will. I am always wondering if I am actually doing it or not.
I want a clear picture about what it is I am supposed to do in this life. I want it to be as clear as the sun or the moon. Those things are so constant, but now that I think of it these things are truly different each day. The moon has a different shape each day and the sun shines different colors each day. The angle in which I enjoy the sun and the moon changes throughout the day. Sometimes if the weather is bad I even have trouble seeing the sun or the moon.
What does that represent to me about death? I see the constancy of death in the rising and setting of the sun and the difference in death in the various ways I experience life by looking at things from a different angle. Sometimes I fill my heart with clouds and rain storms, and I can’t even see what I am supposed to see.
How will I be prepared for death, if I am not always molding myself to see beyond the clouds and rain in my life to enjoy each and every minute that I have now and forever. I want to be more patient as I grow to understand that I have eternity and that death is but a window into understanding that eternity truly exists. I seem to always wonder about the unknown of death and how it will make me different.
I know in my intellect that there is something more in this world than what I know now, but sometimes in my heart I still have doubt and wonder what I can do better that makes that doubt disappear. However, I also think that maybe I am always supposed to have that doubt so that I never take for granted what I have in the here and now before me.
I try to live in the now and not worry about what has passed as it is gone now and actually may be remembered by others very differently than how I remember it. I try not worry about the future as it is not here yet and may never actually be what I expected anyway.
It is a given that this minute I will be in this minute whether I want to or not and the next minute is always unknown. I pray that I live the minute how God intended and not be consumed with what is next whether it be life in death or another minute of life on earth.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Saturday, October 10, 2009
No Blog Today
Today is the day of nothing to say. That is unusual to me, but also a blessing. My husband and I have been so consumed with our ministries that I am always engaged with the people around me. However, today we gave the day to ourselves. That gift, while extermely fruitful, left me with few words. This fits my life being married for 22 years. We are so connected that words are less important as each day goes by us. The only thought I have is God is good all the time, and I am so glad to be married to Jeff. Talk to you again soon, Eileen
Friday, October 9, 2009
So Many Things
My mind is so full of so many things today that I can’t focus on one particular thing. I am thinking of art and numbers and apples and cheese. I continue to wonder why my mind is so connected to so many different things as I sit here and ponder the day. The day was good. I accomplished many tasks. I was able to use the mind that God gave me to use. I was able to focus on the gifts He allowed me to develop so that others turn to me when in need.
How do I recognize the gifts given to me by God? That is always a challenge to me in my life as the gifts I am given are revealed to me each and every day. The gifts emerge like packages under a Christmas tree. Sometimes I know what is inside because it is so obvious like a small package with an engagement ring inside. Sometimes it is not so obvious. The package may be hidden inside a larger package that becomes the object to my attention. Sometimes I become distracted by the wrapping of the package instead of focusing on the package and its contents.
I get most distracted when I focus on the wrapping instead of the package itself. However, I can never forget the wrapping rather than the package because it is what makes the gift special and of importance. Is a gift really a gift if it isn’t wrapped in something that makes it different than what it was without the wrapping? Am I who I am without the wrappings of my life that made me into the person that I am right at this moment?
All of the gifts and distractions allowed me to create a special wrapping around me that completes me. I think of how these gifts are enhanced by the many things in life that attract my attention including art, numbers, apples, wine, flowers, cheese and the list goes on and on. The package is not complete without all of the distractions of life that allowed me to really become who I am from the inside out wrapped in the paper of my life that is most beautiful on me.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
How do I recognize the gifts given to me by God? That is always a challenge to me in my life as the gifts I am given are revealed to me each and every day. The gifts emerge like packages under a Christmas tree. Sometimes I know what is inside because it is so obvious like a small package with an engagement ring inside. Sometimes it is not so obvious. The package may be hidden inside a larger package that becomes the object to my attention. Sometimes I become distracted by the wrapping of the package instead of focusing on the package and its contents.
I get most distracted when I focus on the wrapping instead of the package itself. However, I can never forget the wrapping rather than the package because it is what makes the gift special and of importance. Is a gift really a gift if it isn’t wrapped in something that makes it different than what it was without the wrapping? Am I who I am without the wrappings of my life that made me into the person that I am right at this moment?
All of the gifts and distractions allowed me to create a special wrapping around me that completes me. I think of how these gifts are enhanced by the many things in life that attract my attention including art, numbers, apples, wine, flowers, cheese and the list goes on and on. The package is not complete without all of the distractions of life that allowed me to really become who I am from the inside out wrapped in the paper of my life that is most beautiful on me.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Today
Today is all that I have. This moment is all that I have. When I was driving home from work today suddenly I had the thought, we are all going to die. But now I am thinking rather that we are all going to live!
To die or to live I need to always focus on the life that is before me. I need to never disconnect from the minute at I have before me. Each minute is a relationship that needs to be developed between me and all of the people and all of the experiences that are before me.
I think now mostly of the experiences before me. It is not only the people that I meet in the minutes of my life, but all of the things that surround me that require my attention. How is it that I’m tapping on the keyboard right now? How is it that this even exists? How many things or people were involved in the creation of the keyboard?
Really what comes to my mind is who actually decided that this keyboard should be the color of grey clay? It is such an uninteresting color to me. Or maybe that is the point. If I were focused on the color of the keyboard maybe I wouldn’t be focused on its function.
Isn’t that true of people too? How many times am I drawn into a conversation with a person, but to find out the cover of the person isn’t what I should be focusing on in that moment? It is really the gifts of the person that I should be focusing on instead.
Now should be the focus of my every minute whether it be as I know it now or as I pray that I experience in Heaven.
I pray that I live in the now always.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
To die or to live I need to always focus on the life that is before me. I need to never disconnect from the minute at I have before me. Each minute is a relationship that needs to be developed between me and all of the people and all of the experiences that are before me.
I think now mostly of the experiences before me. It is not only the people that I meet in the minutes of my life, but all of the things that surround me that require my attention. How is it that I’m tapping on the keyboard right now? How is it that this even exists? How many things or people were involved in the creation of the keyboard?
Really what comes to my mind is who actually decided that this keyboard should be the color of grey clay? It is such an uninteresting color to me. Or maybe that is the point. If I were focused on the color of the keyboard maybe I wouldn’t be focused on its function.
Isn’t that true of people too? How many times am I drawn into a conversation with a person, but to find out the cover of the person isn’t what I should be focusing on in that moment? It is really the gifts of the person that I should be focusing on instead.
Now should be the focus of my every minute whether it be as I know it now or as I pray that I experience in Heaven.
I pray that I live in the now always.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Motherhood
I am so overwhelmed with joy to be a mother. I feel I am a better person for having been allowed to create life with my husband, and to watch these two children of mine grow up to be such wonderful people. The connection to God overwhelms me as I think of His love for us, and it is only a fraction of the love we have for our children. My mind then drifts to the love between husband and wife and how it is a foreshadowing of Heaven. When my marriage and family life is at its best, I truly feel like Heaven is on Earth. Don't you?
To create is divine, and I am touched that God allows us to participate in that creation. He gives us the capacity to create life. He gives us the talents to create gadgets. He gives us the talents to serve Him by serving others. Isn't that what life is about? I am at my best when my life is in service to others.
Creation is awesome. Motherhood is awesome. Being a wife is awesome. Service to others is awesome. God's trust in us is even more awesome. Don't you agree?
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
To create is divine, and I am touched that God allows us to participate in that creation. He gives us the capacity to create life. He gives us the talents to create gadgets. He gives us the talents to serve Him by serving others. Isn't that what life is about? I am at my best when my life is in service to others.
Creation is awesome. Motherhood is awesome. Being a wife is awesome. Service to others is awesome. God's trust in us is even more awesome. Don't you agree?
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Green
I keep wondering why the word green comes to mind every time I think about writing my blog. What is green anyway? It is a word that is a color, but not just one color like white. It can be many colors. It also means someone with little or no experience. It also makes me think of mold and how it grows on things that are organic. Why am I thinking of all these things and why does green keep coming to mind?
I’ll just write about what comes to mind. Green is a beautiful color. It is so calming and calling. It draws me in every time I see it no matter the shade. It can be deep, it can be cool, it can be singular or it can be multi-dimensional. It has everything that is needed to make something interesting. It appears in many different ways, but yet there is something common about it. It interests different people at different levels.
Interesting thought about green. Does green have different levels? It seems that it must or the thought wouldn’t have come to my mind. Is it that it can be thin, thick, high or low? I think it can now that I have considered the thought. Green can be thick. It can represent the entire forest and its density and thickness. It can be thin when it is shows itself in the completeness of a leaf. It is can be high when it shows itself in a rainbow and it can be low when it shows itself in the water off the coast of Florida.
How can one thing can be so many things? I think of all things in life and how everything is one thing, but also everything. Can anything exist if not in comparison to something else? Value is always a measure of something against itself or against something else of value. The measure being what makes us understand something.
That brings me to all things in life that are of value being measured against something else of value. Isn’t love what it is because it is measured against something? Is that something the lack of love or is it the intensity of love? I think the measure is the intensity of love, because there can be no lack of love unless love exists so the measure must be love.
How did I get from green to love? Love is calming. Love is calling. Love has many shades. Love can be deep or it can be cool. Love can be singular or multi-dimensional. It can be everything and it definitely makes something interesting. It appears in different ways, but there is something very common about it. It also interests people at different levels too.
It must be that love is in green and green is in love, and that all things are love and are measured against love whether it is a color or it is love itself. Just a thought.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
I’ll just write about what comes to mind. Green is a beautiful color. It is so calming and calling. It draws me in every time I see it no matter the shade. It can be deep, it can be cool, it can be singular or it can be multi-dimensional. It has everything that is needed to make something interesting. It appears in many different ways, but yet there is something common about it. It interests different people at different levels.
Interesting thought about green. Does green have different levels? It seems that it must or the thought wouldn’t have come to my mind. Is it that it can be thin, thick, high or low? I think it can now that I have considered the thought. Green can be thick. It can represent the entire forest and its density and thickness. It can be thin when it is shows itself in the completeness of a leaf. It is can be high when it shows itself in a rainbow and it can be low when it shows itself in the water off the coast of Florida.
How can one thing can be so many things? I think of all things in life and how everything is one thing, but also everything. Can anything exist if not in comparison to something else? Value is always a measure of something against itself or against something else of value. The measure being what makes us understand something.
That brings me to all things in life that are of value being measured against something else of value. Isn’t love what it is because it is measured against something? Is that something the lack of love or is it the intensity of love? I think the measure is the intensity of love, because there can be no lack of love unless love exists so the measure must be love.
How did I get from green to love? Love is calming. Love is calling. Love has many shades. Love can be deep or it can be cool. Love can be singular or multi-dimensional. It can be everything and it definitely makes something interesting. It appears in different ways, but there is something very common about it. It also interests people at different levels too.
It must be that love is in green and green is in love, and that all things are love and are measured against love whether it is a color or it is love itself. Just a thought.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Hope
I am so happy and excited about tomorrow and the opportunity to be with God and all of the women on the retreat that I can’t sleep. I know I need to sleep but I just can’t seem to wind down. Isn’t God’s gift of adrenaline a wonderful thing? He always gives me what I need when I need it.
Just now He gave me a break from my typing. It’s a little disturbing because I usually type my blog straight through in a few minutes, but I must have needed to stop and reflect. So now I think, what is it to reflect? I know what life is to me right now, don’t I? I probably don’t. I think I know what I need, but I don’t always get it right. I think right now that I need to pray. I need to thank God for the gift of my life and the gift of my husband, the gift of my children, the gift of my sorrows and the gift of my joys in life. I can never forget that it all comes from Him. All of it! It just matters what I do with it that makes it good or bad.
Why do I sometimes wallow in the things that make me uncomfortable? It doesn’t seem right even when I’m doing it. It seems that I need to move through it rather than stay in it. It mostly seems that I shouldn’t do it at all. My life is so much better when I accept the here and the now instead of dwelling on what’s gone already or what is to come later.
I mostly think I don’t need to be afraid of life, afraid of the things that will come into my life. I know have the sense of the scripture that the first will be last and the last will be first. Isn’t that the best understanding of how to live life and how to have hope? Hope isn’t in the recognition of life but in the acceptance of life.
I need to accept and acknowledge that I need God and that I need the ordinary things of life that are given to me by God. I need a hug, but mostly I need to give a hug. I need to be accepted, but mostly I need to accept others. I need to be listened to, but mostly I need to listen to others. I need to eat ice cream (really!), but mostly I need to thank God for the person that makes the ice cream that I so enjoy and to take it further than that and thank God for the people that bring the ingredients together, and for the people that raise the cows and the chickens that create the ingredients and for the people that decided to bring the ingredients together to create the ice cream, and the people that built the first freezer to change the ingredients to become something each ingredient was not on its own and to thank God for the opportunity to share my thoughts about ice cream and on an on.
Maybe one day I’ll write about something important, but for now I’m so glad to get these words on a page.
God is good all the time. Ice Cream is good all the time. Hope is good all the time.
Peace your sister in Christ and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Just now He gave me a break from my typing. It’s a little disturbing because I usually type my blog straight through in a few minutes, but I must have needed to stop and reflect. So now I think, what is it to reflect? I know what life is to me right now, don’t I? I probably don’t. I think I know what I need, but I don’t always get it right. I think right now that I need to pray. I need to thank God for the gift of my life and the gift of my husband, the gift of my children, the gift of my sorrows and the gift of my joys in life. I can never forget that it all comes from Him. All of it! It just matters what I do with it that makes it good or bad.
Why do I sometimes wallow in the things that make me uncomfortable? It doesn’t seem right even when I’m doing it. It seems that I need to move through it rather than stay in it. It mostly seems that I shouldn’t do it at all. My life is so much better when I accept the here and the now instead of dwelling on what’s gone already or what is to come later.
I mostly think I don’t need to be afraid of life, afraid of the things that will come into my life. I know have the sense of the scripture that the first will be last and the last will be first. Isn’t that the best understanding of how to live life and how to have hope? Hope isn’t in the recognition of life but in the acceptance of life.
I need to accept and acknowledge that I need God and that I need the ordinary things of life that are given to me by God. I need a hug, but mostly I need to give a hug. I need to be accepted, but mostly I need to accept others. I need to be listened to, but mostly I need to listen to others. I need to eat ice cream (really!), but mostly I need to thank God for the person that makes the ice cream that I so enjoy and to take it further than that and thank God for the people that bring the ingredients together, and for the people that raise the cows and the chickens that create the ingredients and for the people that decided to bring the ingredients together to create the ice cream, and the people that built the first freezer to change the ingredients to become something each ingredient was not on its own and to thank God for the opportunity to share my thoughts about ice cream and on an on.
Maybe one day I’ll write about something important, but for now I’m so glad to get these words on a page.
God is good all the time. Ice Cream is good all the time. Hope is good all the time.
Peace your sister in Christ and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Preparation
I am busy today getting ready for a women’s retreat for my parish. It is the first one that we are having for ACTS which stands for Adoration, Community, Theology and Service. I’ve been preparing for this weekend for almost three years now. I’ve been mentored by a group of women that have been giving these retreats for many years. It has been an awesome experience to know and learn from these women. It has been an awesome experience of growth for me to allow myself to change through the lives and experiences of these women. It has been a great time of preparation for this moment.
What makes preparation so wonderful is it allows me to change through the experience. It allows me to use the gifts that I already know that I have and the gifts that I learn about through my interaction with other people. I challenge myself in preparation, because I encounter people I haven’t experienced before as I plan for the events in my life. The planning is at its best for me when I don’t over plan, but when I allow the people around me to shine and take ownership of the gifts that they give to the world.
How do I tap into the gifts of the other people around me and into the best of the gifts that God has given me is the ultimate challenge of my life. I so many times hide behind the talents that are expected of me rather than the true gifts that God has given me. I sometimes look to other people to define those gifts rather than praying to understand the unique gifts that have been bestowed on me by God.
The gifts given to me are many and are as diverse as being good at finance and as being good at singing in the choir. Now I wonder what those gifts have in common. The most obvious is that both were given to me, but I think there is more to it than that simple connection. My next thought is that I needed the diversity of gifts to allow myself to be more human. If I am caught up mostly in math and not in art, I wouldn’t be complete. That is not to say that one can’t be better at one than the other, but I think if I wasn’t aware of the diversity of my gifts then I wouldn’t be the person I am meant to be.
Wow, preparation is awesome. It makes me tap into the not so obvious of my life. I’d forgotten some things about myself that only truly shine when I allow myself to prepare.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
What makes preparation so wonderful is it allows me to change through the experience. It allows me to use the gifts that I already know that I have and the gifts that I learn about through my interaction with other people. I challenge myself in preparation, because I encounter people I haven’t experienced before as I plan for the events in my life. The planning is at its best for me when I don’t over plan, but when I allow the people around me to shine and take ownership of the gifts that they give to the world.
How do I tap into the gifts of the other people around me and into the best of the gifts that God has given me is the ultimate challenge of my life. I so many times hide behind the talents that are expected of me rather than the true gifts that God has given me. I sometimes look to other people to define those gifts rather than praying to understand the unique gifts that have been bestowed on me by God.
The gifts given to me are many and are as diverse as being good at finance and as being good at singing in the choir. Now I wonder what those gifts have in common. The most obvious is that both were given to me, but I think there is more to it than that simple connection. My next thought is that I needed the diversity of gifts to allow myself to be more human. If I am caught up mostly in math and not in art, I wouldn’t be complete. That is not to say that one can’t be better at one than the other, but I think if I wasn’t aware of the diversity of my gifts then I wouldn’t be the person I am meant to be.
Wow, preparation is awesome. It makes me tap into the not so obvious of my life. I’d forgotten some things about myself that only truly shine when I allow myself to prepare.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Family
What are we but an extension of those that come before us and after us? Don’t they make us who we are and keep us connected to the world around us? I think of my parents when I think of my history. I have no history without my parents. I wouldn’t have come into existence had my parents not participated in the creation of me. What an awesome gift that is to me and hopefully to all those people that are connected to me.
The connection to people is so immense when you start to put a number around it. I think of how my life and the life of my husband have impacted our children and even our parents. Haven’t we through how we’ve lived and through how they have lived learned so many things? I think I have. It also grows through our connection to the world outside of our immediate families.
I think of how when I traveled to China on business that the impact of how I exist through my parents and how I am who I am through the influence of my children that I influenced those in the room in a meeting in an industrial town in the city of Shengli, China. We can’t disconnect from that experience. We always have the connection no matter how big or small. We can’t ignore it even when we don’t understand or acknowledge the connection. I am so overwhelmed with the sense of “We are one body, one body in Christ….” This is a fundamental truth of life.
This also reminds me of a time when someone made accusations of someone in my life that were not founded in the truth and how I was so angry, so very angry. I prayed and reflected on the actions of the individual and on my reaction of anger. God was so clear in his words to me that I had to apologize to the woman. God told me that He loved that woman so much, and that I needed to look beyond the recent action and see what He saw in the woman. Look at her as a woman of service and a woman that lives out her vocation of motherhood with great purpose and great honor. He asked me to understand the He forgives her for her wrong actions just like he forgives me for my wrong actions. Why can’t I see beyond the action to the soul of the woman and see His face in her face?
I prayed and asked for this and He granted the request. I was able to write her an apology note and ask her to forgive me for not honoring her as God honors her. We smiled and hugged and moved to the next moments in our life. We were connected forever in this moment, a moment that began because each of us is a creation from God that extends from the human experience.
How awesome is He in trusting us with such an enormous gift. I pray that we too respect and love those around us in our families and in our connections through our families just as God trust and loves us. I pray this whether our connections in life are the family that lives next door to us or the family that lives in Shengli, China.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
The connection to people is so immense when you start to put a number around it. I think of how my life and the life of my husband have impacted our children and even our parents. Haven’t we through how we’ve lived and through how they have lived learned so many things? I think I have. It also grows through our connection to the world outside of our immediate families.
I think of how when I traveled to China on business that the impact of how I exist through my parents and how I am who I am through the influence of my children that I influenced those in the room in a meeting in an industrial town in the city of Shengli, China. We can’t disconnect from that experience. We always have the connection no matter how big or small. We can’t ignore it even when we don’t understand or acknowledge the connection. I am so overwhelmed with the sense of “We are one body, one body in Christ….” This is a fundamental truth of life.
This also reminds me of a time when someone made accusations of someone in my life that were not founded in the truth and how I was so angry, so very angry. I prayed and reflected on the actions of the individual and on my reaction of anger. God was so clear in his words to me that I had to apologize to the woman. God told me that He loved that woman so much, and that I needed to look beyond the recent action and see what He saw in the woman. Look at her as a woman of service and a woman that lives out her vocation of motherhood with great purpose and great honor. He asked me to understand the He forgives her for her wrong actions just like he forgives me for my wrong actions. Why can’t I see beyond the action to the soul of the woman and see His face in her face?
I prayed and asked for this and He granted the request. I was able to write her an apology note and ask her to forgive me for not honoring her as God honors her. We smiled and hugged and moved to the next moments in our life. We were connected forever in this moment, a moment that began because each of us is a creation from God that extends from the human experience.
How awesome is He in trusting us with such an enormous gift. I pray that we too respect and love those around us in our families and in our connections through our families just as God trust and loves us. I pray this whether our connections in life are the family that lives next door to us or the family that lives in Shengli, China.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Friday, September 25, 2009
We Are One
Today I keep thinking about how I am who I am through my husband and how he is who he is through me. Can it be that I am more me because of someone else? Can it be that someone else if more because of me? That just blows my mind to think of it, but I know it to be true.
I think of all the times before I met my husband that I felt like I didn’t know what it was to be whole. I always felt that I was missing a piece of my self. It wasn’t that I didn’t have great life before. I have a great, loving mother and I grew up in a loving family that celebrated life together so often that I know what celebration means so deeply that it makes me smile to think about it.
I take those things in my life that are great and that are not so great and mesh them with the life that my husband brought into our marriage, and I see a great flower garden emerge. There are so many flowers in the garden that my breath is taken away when I walk up on the garden. There are sunflowers, roses, weeds, mulch and blank spots and on and on.
Wow that makes me wonder about what each of those things means to me. What is a sunflower? It is such a beautiful flower. It is bold and bright and commands our attention and knows just where to turn to get the light. It is so accomplished in its task that its name defines it task. It is to turn toward the light.
What is a rose? When I think of a rose I think of beauty but also of complexity and thorns. But roses are so very beautiful. One is never like the other. Each rose has a different amount of petals and thorns and a different sweetness that draws you in to the experience of the rose.
But to me the weeds are the most interesting. They seem to appear everywhere, but only overshadow the beauty of the flowers if you let them. I can control the weeds if I take the time to do it. I only need the desire to do the task for it to have purpose and the result that I need.
Only if I forget to weed the flowerbeds in my life does it get out of control. What are the weeds in my life? Is it that I continue to forget to pray? Is it that I forget to honor my husband and children for the great gift they are to me? Is that I forget to thank God for my parents? Even though I didn’t even really know my father shouldn’t I honor him because if he didn’t exist I would not!
Tomorrow I think I will share my thoughts on the great gift of our parents and the great gift of our children. I pray I don’t forget. Don’t let me. We are who we are through the people we let into our lives. Our husbands and wives, our children, our parents, the blank spots and the mulch and the list goes on and on….. Peace and I’ll talk to you again soon.
Love You, Eileen
I think of all the times before I met my husband that I felt like I didn’t know what it was to be whole. I always felt that I was missing a piece of my self. It wasn’t that I didn’t have great life before. I have a great, loving mother and I grew up in a loving family that celebrated life together so often that I know what celebration means so deeply that it makes me smile to think about it.
I take those things in my life that are great and that are not so great and mesh them with the life that my husband brought into our marriage, and I see a great flower garden emerge. There are so many flowers in the garden that my breath is taken away when I walk up on the garden. There are sunflowers, roses, weeds, mulch and blank spots and on and on.
Wow that makes me wonder about what each of those things means to me. What is a sunflower? It is such a beautiful flower. It is bold and bright and commands our attention and knows just where to turn to get the light. It is so accomplished in its task that its name defines it task. It is to turn toward the light.
What is a rose? When I think of a rose I think of beauty but also of complexity and thorns. But roses are so very beautiful. One is never like the other. Each rose has a different amount of petals and thorns and a different sweetness that draws you in to the experience of the rose.
But to me the weeds are the most interesting. They seem to appear everywhere, but only overshadow the beauty of the flowers if you let them. I can control the weeds if I take the time to do it. I only need the desire to do the task for it to have purpose and the result that I need.
Only if I forget to weed the flowerbeds in my life does it get out of control. What are the weeds in my life? Is it that I continue to forget to pray? Is it that I forget to honor my husband and children for the great gift they are to me? Is that I forget to thank God for my parents? Even though I didn’t even really know my father shouldn’t I honor him because if he didn’t exist I would not!
Tomorrow I think I will share my thoughts on the great gift of our parents and the great gift of our children. I pray I don’t forget. Don’t let me. We are who we are through the people we let into our lives. Our husbands and wives, our children, our parents, the blank spots and the mulch and the list goes on and on….. Peace and I’ll talk to you again soon.
Love You, Eileen
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Success
All day long I’ve been surrounded with the thought of success. I strive to get everything done that needs to get done. I worry that I’m not doing it good enough or fast enough. I worry that I’ve not considered all the options so as to make sure no problems arise out of the decisions I’ve made today.
But now as I sit here I wonder what the real meaning of success is. Those thoughts all seem so small. Is it really that all the options have been considered or all the tasks been checked off of the list? Well today it seemed to me that it was as I encountered the day I had before me.
The concern is there that if I do more things; finish more tasks, that it will all be alright. I will have completed what needed to be done and then I will be able to get the gold star on my paper like I did in elementary school. It was so simple then. If I spelled all the words right, I received a 100. Isn’t that what I’m still striving for in my day to day? I want to get that 100 again, but it is not possible in my adult world. There is always something more to do, someone else to help, something that I think I need to finish.
I seem to be missing the point. It’s the journey not the task that gets the 100. How did I treat myself today? How did I treat the person working the cash register at Kroger today? My children? My husband? My co-worker?
It doesn’t matter how much recognition I get for the tasks I’ve accomplished, but how much recognition I give to those that I encounter while I complete my tasks. I don’t mean to say the tasks aren’t important, because they are important. I need the tasks to give me work to do so that I have purpose. God wants me to have commitments and responsibilities. He wants me to have these so that I can encounter people so that I can treat them like He treats me.
Success! It is so simple, why do I make it seem so difficult.
God is good and patient.
I pray that I am those things to all of you.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
But now as I sit here I wonder what the real meaning of success is. Those thoughts all seem so small. Is it really that all the options have been considered or all the tasks been checked off of the list? Well today it seemed to me that it was as I encountered the day I had before me.
The concern is there that if I do more things; finish more tasks, that it will all be alright. I will have completed what needed to be done and then I will be able to get the gold star on my paper like I did in elementary school. It was so simple then. If I spelled all the words right, I received a 100. Isn’t that what I’m still striving for in my day to day? I want to get that 100 again, but it is not possible in my adult world. There is always something more to do, someone else to help, something that I think I need to finish.
I seem to be missing the point. It’s the journey not the task that gets the 100. How did I treat myself today? How did I treat the person working the cash register at Kroger today? My children? My husband? My co-worker?
It doesn’t matter how much recognition I get for the tasks I’ve accomplished, but how much recognition I give to those that I encounter while I complete my tasks. I don’t mean to say the tasks aren’t important, because they are important. I need the tasks to give me work to do so that I have purpose. God wants me to have commitments and responsibilities. He wants me to have these so that I can encounter people so that I can treat them like He treats me.
Success! It is so simple, why do I make it seem so difficult.
God is good and patient.
I pray that I am those things to all of you.
Peace and talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Wonderful
I am sitting here thinking about today, and the only thing that comes to mind is wonderful. It is so wonderful that I had to make decisions, so wonderful that I had to sit in traffic, so wonderful that I had to cook dinner. Wait a minute!!! Did I really say all of that in my head?
Well I did, because I am eternally grateful for every day that I’ve lived on this earth. I’ve forgotten it so many times. I’ve been so caught up in all the “things” that have happened to me. So many times I’ve been caught up in how this world has treated me, rather than how I’ve treated this world. I continually try to consider others when I make decisions, but seem to always be centered on what it is that will make me most comfortable in my day or even in my minute.
This is all so confusing to me, when I really sit back and think about what things in life have meant the most to me and rarely were they easy. The things that we like huge mountains or great hardships are what have really centered and moved me to a better place in my life.
I see this when I see a performer on the stage or a doctor in her office. These things took great sacrifice and great commitment. The performer, the doctor, the musician, the priest, the president, the CEO, the nun, the librarian, trash collector and on and on didn’t get to be good at what they do without considering other people, without sacrifice and commitment, or without love for the work that we do each and every day. I do things I don’t want to do, because they need to get done.
Don’t you? Didn’t God? I see that in Jesus’ life. He gave so much to us through the things he didn’t want to do. He asked his Father to take this cup from Him, but He endured it. He endured the wonderful life giving sacrifice so that I could be here to experience this day as a daughter, wife, mother and friend.
Oh what a wonderful day I’ve had.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Well I did, because I am eternally grateful for every day that I’ve lived on this earth. I’ve forgotten it so many times. I’ve been so caught up in all the “things” that have happened to me. So many times I’ve been caught up in how this world has treated me, rather than how I’ve treated this world. I continually try to consider others when I make decisions, but seem to always be centered on what it is that will make me most comfortable in my day or even in my minute.
This is all so confusing to me, when I really sit back and think about what things in life have meant the most to me and rarely were they easy. The things that we like huge mountains or great hardships are what have really centered and moved me to a better place in my life.
I see this when I see a performer on the stage or a doctor in her office. These things took great sacrifice and great commitment. The performer, the doctor, the musician, the priest, the president, the CEO, the nun, the librarian, trash collector and on and on didn’t get to be good at what they do without considering other people, without sacrifice and commitment, or without love for the work that we do each and every day. I do things I don’t want to do, because they need to get done.
Don’t you? Didn’t God? I see that in Jesus’ life. He gave so much to us through the things he didn’t want to do. He asked his Father to take this cup from Him, but He endured it. He endured the wonderful life giving sacrifice so that I could be here to experience this day as a daughter, wife, mother and friend.
Oh what a wonderful day I’ve had.
Talk to you again soon.
Eileen
Monday, September 21, 2009
Marriage
I’ve had the great privilege of being married to my husband, Jeff Borski, for 22 years. I’ll be honest I didn’t even know what I was looking for in a husband when we met. I really just thought he was cute. But God knew what I was looking for, and He delivered a winner to me. Thank you God for the beautiful gift of my marriage.
Marriage to me has been a journey in acceptance, love, trust, forgiveness and holiness. Oh we have arguments and disagreements, but through these we’ve learned to be better people. Isn’t it that God shows me how to accept people each and every day by His acceptance of me each and every day? So in accepting the twists and turns of our marriage, I’ve grown in holiness. Although I still have lots of growing to do!
I like to think of our marriage as a roller coaster. The first time you ride one and you go up, up, up, your emotions are heightened and you are so filled with the unknown it seems like the climb takes forever and then the drop comes. And oh how that drop feels. It seems to take an eternity also. Will this sinking feeling ever end? Will we ever be on the up cycle again? Well, then before you know it you are going up again, but this time you know what to expect on the other side. The down cycle allowed us to hold each other closer as we sit next to each other on the ride.
This is the same in our marriage. As we go through a struggle, we’ve learned to lean in and hold on to each other tighter and with the knowledge that we can get through this one. We’ve done it before. It wasn’t so bad. We actually learned a lot through it, and our love is stronger. We know we can make it through another one.
Wow, the ride is over for now. We can get off the ride and just stroll through the park enjoying the life that is around us. These are the times when God gives us the chance to rest and to develop a relationship with Him not out of fear, but out of love. These are the times when we can hear His voice, His holy whispers, to us that guide us on the path to fulfill His will in our marriage.
Oh, but we usually go back to the amusement park again next summer. When will we learn? Clearly, there is always something we can learn through a struggle, but it is how we handle that struggle that has changed for us over the years. We’ve started to not worry so much about the small things. We know now that this too shall pass, and we will be better people because we held on tight to each other through it and allowed God to hold us up and guide us. We know we don’t have to do it alone.
What an awesome gift marriage is to me. Thank you God for reminding me that it is the vocation that makes me who I am, and that makes me able to grow more and more towards You each day.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Marriage to me has been a journey in acceptance, love, trust, forgiveness and holiness. Oh we have arguments and disagreements, but through these we’ve learned to be better people. Isn’t it that God shows me how to accept people each and every day by His acceptance of me each and every day? So in accepting the twists and turns of our marriage, I’ve grown in holiness. Although I still have lots of growing to do!
I like to think of our marriage as a roller coaster. The first time you ride one and you go up, up, up, your emotions are heightened and you are so filled with the unknown it seems like the climb takes forever and then the drop comes. And oh how that drop feels. It seems to take an eternity also. Will this sinking feeling ever end? Will we ever be on the up cycle again? Well, then before you know it you are going up again, but this time you know what to expect on the other side. The down cycle allowed us to hold each other closer as we sit next to each other on the ride.
This is the same in our marriage. As we go through a struggle, we’ve learned to lean in and hold on to each other tighter and with the knowledge that we can get through this one. We’ve done it before. It wasn’t so bad. We actually learned a lot through it, and our love is stronger. We know we can make it through another one.
Wow, the ride is over for now. We can get off the ride and just stroll through the park enjoying the life that is around us. These are the times when God gives us the chance to rest and to develop a relationship with Him not out of fear, but out of love. These are the times when we can hear His voice, His holy whispers, to us that guide us on the path to fulfill His will in our marriage.
Oh, but we usually go back to the amusement park again next summer. When will we learn? Clearly, there is always something we can learn through a struggle, but it is how we handle that struggle that has changed for us over the years. We’ve started to not worry so much about the small things. We know now that this too shall pass, and we will be better people because we held on tight to each other through it and allowed God to hold us up and guide us. We know we don’t have to do it alone.
What an awesome gift marriage is to me. Thank you God for reminding me that it is the vocation that makes me who I am, and that makes me able to grow more and more towards You each day.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Today
Today was not about me, and that is a good thing. Every day I seem to want the day to be about me, and I always pray that it is not and that I allow myself to honor those around me.
My husband was out of town the entire week on a business trip, and I missed him so much. I wanted to spend the entire weekend with him. I wanted the weekend to be about me! He, however, needed to have some time to disconnect from the week of being with others that commanded his time. He wanted to be with guys that lifted him up instead of draining him.
How do I as a wife disconnect from the selfishness of wanting to be with him and let him have the fellowship that he needs to feel complete? What I’ve discovered is that the rosary helps me to be the wife that I should be instead of the woman that I think I must be. I need to be selfless instead of selfish. I need to allow myself to disconnect from the supposed needs that I have. I need to become the woman that exists to be what God’s wants instead of what I want.
What a reality check I need! The awesomeness that emerges from this discovery is that I am happier because he is happier. How will society understand that mystery?
They will understand it because it is the truth and the truth will set us all free.
Peace is good. Life is good, and God is good.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
My husband was out of town the entire week on a business trip, and I missed him so much. I wanted to spend the entire weekend with him. I wanted the weekend to be about me! He, however, needed to have some time to disconnect from the week of being with others that commanded his time. He wanted to be with guys that lifted him up instead of draining him.
How do I as a wife disconnect from the selfishness of wanting to be with him and let him have the fellowship that he needs to feel complete? What I’ve discovered is that the rosary helps me to be the wife that I should be instead of the woman that I think I must be. I need to be selfless instead of selfish. I need to allow myself to disconnect from the supposed needs that I have. I need to become the woman that exists to be what God’s wants instead of what I want.
What a reality check I need! The awesomeness that emerges from this discovery is that I am happier because he is happier. How will society understand that mystery?
They will understand it because it is the truth and the truth will set us all free.
Peace is good. Life is good, and God is good.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Friday, September 18, 2009
Wonder
Why do we wonder? Why do we care? What makes us want to know more than we do?
I always wonder about life and about what I am doing right now and what I will do next. It almost seems to give me purpose. I don't know what I would do if I didn't wonder. I am always searching for the meaning in life or really the meaning of the minute.
Today was about finding people. I was trying to find people so they can show love and honor to those people that they know in their own lives that mean so much to them. This made me think of the people that are so near and dear to me.
Sometimes I forget to tell the people that I love the most that they are so important to us. I take those people for granted and spend most of my day lifting up people that I don't even really now. I am not saying that the lifting up those we don't know is a bad thing, but I just don't want to stop trying to lift up those that are closest to me.
What can make me more interested in showing such respect and claiming a desire to build them up? I think it is about accepting myself and knowing that I am worthy of giving love and honor to those around me including the ones that are closest to me in my life.
I think I always know that there is something in me worthy of love, but sometimes I hide behind the question. I always wonder if I'm interesting enough, funny enough, intelligent enough, pretty enough to be worthy of giving love and receiving love.
Do I care? Yes, I care. Do I wonder? Yes, I wonder. Mostly I wonder about you and how your day is going and how it is that our lives connect to make it better for both you and me so that we can meet our full potential in this life. I wonder how we can all live our lives to our fullest potentials or how we can live our lives according to God's will.
I wonder if I am truly focused on what is important and not what is supposed to be important. I wonder if I've done all that I can do to find or recognize the people in my life that bring me closer to God. Do you wonder the same things?
Let me know.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
I always wonder about life and about what I am doing right now and what I will do next. It almost seems to give me purpose. I don't know what I would do if I didn't wonder. I am always searching for the meaning in life or really the meaning of the minute.
Today was about finding people. I was trying to find people so they can show love and honor to those people that they know in their own lives that mean so much to them. This made me think of the people that are so near and dear to me.
Sometimes I forget to tell the people that I love the most that they are so important to us. I take those people for granted and spend most of my day lifting up people that I don't even really now. I am not saying that the lifting up those we don't know is a bad thing, but I just don't want to stop trying to lift up those that are closest to me.
What can make me more interested in showing such respect and claiming a desire to build them up? I think it is about accepting myself and knowing that I am worthy of giving love and honor to those around me including the ones that are closest to me in my life.
I think I always know that there is something in me worthy of love, but sometimes I hide behind the question. I always wonder if I'm interesting enough, funny enough, intelligent enough, pretty enough to be worthy of giving love and receiving love.
Do I care? Yes, I care. Do I wonder? Yes, I wonder. Mostly I wonder about you and how your day is going and how it is that our lives connect to make it better for both you and me so that we can meet our full potential in this life. I wonder how we can all live our lives to our fullest potentials or how we can live our lives according to God's will.
I wonder if I am truly focused on what is important and not what is supposed to be important. I wonder if I've done all that I can do to find or recognize the people in my life that bring me closer to God. Do you wonder the same things?
Let me know.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
The Big Apple
Today was such an interesting day. I reflected on so many things about life that intrigued me. I thought about struggles and happiness and how these are connected. It made me think about what we eat and why we eat it.
For example, apples are such interesting pieces of fruit. They are so tough on the outside, and so sweet and crunchy on the inside. I love buying one at the grocery store. There is usually a huge pile stacked in neat rows, and I spend the time to pick just the right ones. For me the process is intense. I don’t want to pick the ones with a bruise or ones that are the wrong size. I want to have just the right size snack without any blemishes.
I also remember in elementary school when I discovered that slicing one in a different way showed a different center. One way was a star and the other just seeds lined up next to the other.
How is life reflected in the apple? Aren’t we a little tough on the outside, but sweet and crunchy, or complex and interesting, on the inside? I see people that appear a certain way on the outside, but once you get past that initial layer you find a sweet surprise. They are so kind and gentle, but have built a wall that keeps all the interesting textures and flavors on the inside. It just takes someone to have the courage to take the first bite or make the first connection to become friends with someone.
Isn’t that the way marriage evolves? We are in a situation and we meet a person that interests us enough to date the person. We have our skin on that protects us so that person can’t hurt us or even get to know us unless the courage emerges to break through that skin. The person has enough courage to go first to share a personal story that allows you to share one of your own so that you can truly get to know each other’s sweetness and texture.
Aren’t we more interesting when looked at, or sliced, a different way? We all have so many different things that we have or will accomplish in this life. The best way for these gifts to emerge is to accept and understand that we have a skin built around us to protect ourselves, but that we must let that skin be pierced to show the world our sweetness and our texture.
Life’s struggles are like an apple, if we just pierce the skin.
I’ll talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Fear
What is fear and why do we have it? We all feel it when we're in a situation that we don't like. Our heart races, our skin gets goose bumps, and we just want to run. Why is that?
Today I was on a mini-retreat and spent the day contemplating fear and what it means and how it works. I thought about how it holds me back from what I am supposed to accomplish, but mostly I thought about how fear can move me forward.
It makes me acknowledge my weaknesses and dependence on others and on God. How could I develop a relationship with God that is strong and respectful of His almighty power and love, had I not experienced fear and needed to turn to Him?
He lifts me up in my times of fear.
He loves me in my times of fear.
He accepts me in those times of fear.
He lets me be myself in times of fear.
He allows me to learn about Him in my times of fear.
He builds a bridge to Him in my times of fear.
Oh wonderful fear when I allow God to pull me through it.
Fear is part of me and I can't escape it. Lord, Let me know at the deepest level that it is an opportunity to learn and accept my life.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Today I was on a mini-retreat and spent the day contemplating fear and what it means and how it works. I thought about how it holds me back from what I am supposed to accomplish, but mostly I thought about how fear can move me forward.
It makes me acknowledge my weaknesses and dependence on others and on God. How could I develop a relationship with God that is strong and respectful of His almighty power and love, had I not experienced fear and needed to turn to Him?
He lifts me up in my times of fear.
He loves me in my times of fear.
He accepts me in those times of fear.
He lets me be myself in times of fear.
He allows me to learn about Him in my times of fear.
He builds a bridge to Him in my times of fear.
Oh wonderful fear when I allow God to pull me through it.
Fear is part of me and I can't escape it. Lord, Let me know at the deepest level that it is an opportunity to learn and accept my life.
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Friday, September 11, 2009
My Place
When I think about where I belong in this world, I always seem to be considering where I am right now. I worry, is it that I'm supposed to be here, or am I supposed to be somewhere else. How do we ever really know what it is that we are supposed to do with the time that we are given?
As I think of these things, I consider what I did today. I woke up 30 minutes late as usual. (Am I really waking up late if that is what I do every day?) Ate a typical breakfast of peanut butter and bread. I drove to work while sitting in lots of traffic as it rained. I listened to the radio both country and Christian music. Once at work, I began to do all the same things I always do. I answered my emails, made some phone calls, reviewed some contracts, planned some activities for next week, etc....Was that what I was supposed to be doing?
My heart says it doesn't really matter. Although my mind is always wondering if it does. If we are doing a task, and it is a good task, such as earning a living or baking a cake, all of these things are pleasing to God. It only matters what we do while we are doing those tasks that are important. How do we treat others around us? How do we treat the work we are doing? Do we do it the best that we can and use the gifts that God gave us to the fullest? Do we realize all that we do is a prayer of thanksgiving to God?
If we do, then it doesn't matter what we do or where we are. It just matters that we exist and that we honor the moment and the people that are in our midst at that very moment.
So where do I belong anyway? I belong right where I am right at the moment that I'm there!
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
As I think of these things, I consider what I did today. I woke up 30 minutes late as usual. (Am I really waking up late if that is what I do every day?) Ate a typical breakfast of peanut butter and bread. I drove to work while sitting in lots of traffic as it rained. I listened to the radio both country and Christian music. Once at work, I began to do all the same things I always do. I answered my emails, made some phone calls, reviewed some contracts, planned some activities for next week, etc....Was that what I was supposed to be doing?
My heart says it doesn't really matter. Although my mind is always wondering if it does. If we are doing a task, and it is a good task, such as earning a living or baking a cake, all of these things are pleasing to God. It only matters what we do while we are doing those tasks that are important. How do we treat others around us? How do we treat the work we are doing? Do we do it the best that we can and use the gifts that God gave us to the fullest? Do we realize all that we do is a prayer of thanksgiving to God?
If we do, then it doesn't matter what we do or where we are. It just matters that we exist and that we honor the moment and the people that are in our midst at that very moment.
So where do I belong anyway? I belong right where I am right at the moment that I'm there!
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Talent
I really like watching talent shows. Here lately I’ve been watching “So You Think You Can Dance” and “America’s Got Talent”. They are such entertaining shows. The singing and dancing makes me want to get on my feet and clap out loud. I really love the energy, laughter and joy of the performances.
How is it that music and dance makes us feel such peace and energy at the same time? It seems our bodies are geared for the opportunity to tune into something that is tangible, but intangible all at the same time. Our bodies feel the music, but we can’t see the music. We can hear the notes, see the notes on a page, but there is something more to the notes than what we hear with our ears or see on the page.
It is the same with other forms of talent. There is always something more to it than what is on the surface. I think that is why we are drawn to it. It is not about the moment of entertainment, but the moment of finding ourselves in the entertainment. Isn’t it at a movie or a concert that we can feel that we are part of the action? I know even when I watch things I don’t like to watch like a thriller movie, the reason I don’t like to watch it is that I’m drawn into something I don’t want to experience. I can’t detach from it totally.
It’s the same with what we do want to experience. We can’t pull away from it entirely, because we want to be drawn into the moment. We want to feel the pull of the music in our hearts, we want to feel the emotion of the romantic comedy on our minds, we want to feel the message of scripture, and the list goes on and on.
We all know at our deepest level that all of our senses are needed to experience life and hope at the finest level. So mostly we don’t fight it, we just allow ourselves to live in the moment of a song, to live in the moment of a movie, or to live in the moment of conversation with the Lord.
Isn’t that conversation with the Lord, or prayer, what really makes it all make sense? Isn’t everything a prayer? Our conversations with each other, our thoughts about life, our gifts to others through our service as mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers, our education, our work, our commitments and our love for each other. All of these things are prayers and a great thank you to the Lord. He loves us so very much. He made everything that we do an opportunity for pray. Lord, I pray that I never stop realizing the gifts of my life and that I continue to open my heart to your love.
I know that if I continue to watch the talents of others, including watching “So You Think You Can Dance, and “America’s Got Talent”, that I will through prayer begin to realize all of the talents that the Lord has given me to share with this world.
Peace to all of you,
Eileen
How is it that music and dance makes us feel such peace and energy at the same time? It seems our bodies are geared for the opportunity to tune into something that is tangible, but intangible all at the same time. Our bodies feel the music, but we can’t see the music. We can hear the notes, see the notes on a page, but there is something more to the notes than what we hear with our ears or see on the page.
It is the same with other forms of talent. There is always something more to it than what is on the surface. I think that is why we are drawn to it. It is not about the moment of entertainment, but the moment of finding ourselves in the entertainment. Isn’t it at a movie or a concert that we can feel that we are part of the action? I know even when I watch things I don’t like to watch like a thriller movie, the reason I don’t like to watch it is that I’m drawn into something I don’t want to experience. I can’t detach from it totally.
It’s the same with what we do want to experience. We can’t pull away from it entirely, because we want to be drawn into the moment. We want to feel the pull of the music in our hearts, we want to feel the emotion of the romantic comedy on our minds, we want to feel the message of scripture, and the list goes on and on.
We all know at our deepest level that all of our senses are needed to experience life and hope at the finest level. So mostly we don’t fight it, we just allow ourselves to live in the moment of a song, to live in the moment of a movie, or to live in the moment of conversation with the Lord.
Isn’t that conversation with the Lord, or prayer, what really makes it all make sense? Isn’t everything a prayer? Our conversations with each other, our thoughts about life, our gifts to others through our service as mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers, our education, our work, our commitments and our love for each other. All of these things are prayers and a great thank you to the Lord. He loves us so very much. He made everything that we do an opportunity for pray. Lord, I pray that I never stop realizing the gifts of my life and that I continue to open my heart to your love.
I know that if I continue to watch the talents of others, including watching “So You Think You Can Dance, and “America’s Got Talent”, that I will through prayer begin to realize all of the talents that the Lord has given me to share with this world.
Peace to all of you,
Eileen
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Today
How is that I start the each weekday the same, but it ends up so different? Every day I pretend that I'm going to wake up at 6:15 a.m. I religiously set my alarm for that time, but I never actually get out of bed until 6:45 a.m. The routine of it makes me laugh as I write this now.
Every weekday, I know that I need to be at work at the same time, but I almost never get there on time. What is it that makes me not want to get out of the bed? My initial thought is how good it feels to sleep, but then I remember that I never really want to go to bed. In the evening, I am enjoying visiting with my family, watching a TV show or looking on the internet. When I'm doing those things I'm almost never thinking about how good it feels to sleep.
On a broader level, it makes me I think of how I resist change. Maybe on a very simple level that is what I'm doing each an every day. That's makes me wonder why I am resisting change? Or is that really the answer anyway? I don't know. What I'm wondering now is if other's are that way? Or is it just me?
Now I'm thinking about what other things are hidden in our minds? What things are we all living that no one knows about us? What are our secrets and how do they impact how we interact with the world?
My secrets are less and less as I mature, but not completely non-existent. I am so much more comfortable in my skin. It's funny how the more wrinkles I get, the happier I am. Isn't it funny that on the surface society teaches us that youthfulness is the key to happiness, but for me it has been so clearly the opposite?
Maybe each day isn't really different at all? It's really just a series of choices that lead us to happiness or not. The more I allow truth and acceptance to guide my choices each day, the more I am fulfilled and feel in tune with God's will in my life. That is what truly leads me to happiness. How about you?
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Every weekday, I know that I need to be at work at the same time, but I almost never get there on time. What is it that makes me not want to get out of the bed? My initial thought is how good it feels to sleep, but then I remember that I never really want to go to bed. In the evening, I am enjoying visiting with my family, watching a TV show or looking on the internet. When I'm doing those things I'm almost never thinking about how good it feels to sleep.
On a broader level, it makes me I think of how I resist change. Maybe on a very simple level that is what I'm doing each an every day. That's makes me wonder why I am resisting change? Or is that really the answer anyway? I don't know. What I'm wondering now is if other's are that way? Or is it just me?
Now I'm thinking about what other things are hidden in our minds? What things are we all living that no one knows about us? What are our secrets and how do they impact how we interact with the world?
My secrets are less and less as I mature, but not completely non-existent. I am so much more comfortable in my skin. It's funny how the more wrinkles I get, the happier I am. Isn't it funny that on the surface society teaches us that youthfulness is the key to happiness, but for me it has been so clearly the opposite?
Maybe each day isn't really different at all? It's really just a series of choices that lead us to happiness or not. The more I allow truth and acceptance to guide my choices each day, the more I am fulfilled and feel in tune with God's will in my life. That is what truly leads me to happiness. How about you?
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Monday, September 7, 2009
Snickers
I just finished eating a candy bar It was a Snicker’s bar. The creamy texture of the chocolate is soooo very good, but is even better along side the crunchiness of the peanuts and the stickiness of the caramel. Wow, what a good combination of flavors and textures.
On the surface it seems like such a simple thing to enjoy, but surely there is something more to it than just the experience. How did the flavors come to be? Who was the person that first thought to combine the flavors? Who was the person that first thought to create each of the flavors? Who was the person that first found the raw ingredients that go into creating the flavors? How many years did it take for the flavors to be discovered and then to be combined to create an item that we believe to be so simple? In fact, so simple in our world that we can go the any store along the road and buy one for less than a dollar.
How did the value of such an item become so small when you think of all the time and energy that went into creating such a treat? How is this less valuable than a diamond? How is this less valuable than a gallon of gasoline?
What makes something valuable anyway? Isn’t it just perception? What makes us perceive the song of a certain singer to be more valuable than another singer such that the individual becomes a superstar, but another does not? Isn’t it the combination of the things that make something more interesting than the individual parts, but not taking away from the value of the individual parts?
That thought blows my mind when I think of how that applies to life and the people we meet. Aren’t we all better for having met others in our life, having experienced our struggles and our joys, and having allowed ourselves to take the time to recognize the combination of those things in our life?
Aren’t we all better for having enjoyed a Snicker’s bar every now and then? The value surpasses anything I can think of right now!!!!!
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
On the surface it seems like such a simple thing to enjoy, but surely there is something more to it than just the experience. How did the flavors come to be? Who was the person that first thought to combine the flavors? Who was the person that first thought to create each of the flavors? Who was the person that first found the raw ingredients that go into creating the flavors? How many years did it take for the flavors to be discovered and then to be combined to create an item that we believe to be so simple? In fact, so simple in our world that we can go the any store along the road and buy one for less than a dollar.
How did the value of such an item become so small when you think of all the time and energy that went into creating such a treat? How is this less valuable than a diamond? How is this less valuable than a gallon of gasoline?
What makes something valuable anyway? Isn’t it just perception? What makes us perceive the song of a certain singer to be more valuable than another singer such that the individual becomes a superstar, but another does not? Isn’t it the combination of the things that make something more interesting than the individual parts, but not taking away from the value of the individual parts?
That thought blows my mind when I think of how that applies to life and the people we meet. Aren’t we all better for having met others in our life, having experienced our struggles and our joys, and having allowed ourselves to take the time to recognize the combination of those things in our life?
Aren’t we all better for having enjoyed a Snicker’s bar every now and then? The value surpasses anything I can think of right now!!!!!
Talk to you again soon,
Eileen
Thursday, September 3, 2009
What's Up
Wow, what a day! I was so busy and so consumed with all that had to be done. I was able to add to the tasks of the day by being open to the life that was around me. I saw so many people smile at the opportunity to live life. What joy I saw in people that finally had a story to tell. What simple stories they were, but so profound in that the decision to share was awesome. I learned about a guy that needed to buy a new car. I learned that a woman I work with is planning a trip to Georgia, and I learned one woman I work with is Catholic, and she is searching for a connection to life.
All of these people are trying to connect to something. All are trying to live the life that was given to them by God. How do I live that connection every day? Sometimes I'm good at it and I am full of life, but sometimes I am selfish and only think of myself. How does that occur? Shouldn't we by God's gift to us be filled with the desire to serve and to think of everyone but ourselves? But somehow it always turns around to me?
What I wonder about is whether it really can be about others if it isn't about us? Aren't the others supposed to be concerned about us? So isn't it really all about me anyway? Does that even make any sense?
What does make sense is that if we are all concerned about others then the "me" concern fades away because our needs are filled. This is so true most especially in marriage. When I think about the gift that the man brings to the marriage, it overwhelms me. Jeff is called to love me like Christ loves the Church! Wow, what a tall order that is for him. When you think about it that means he is called to die for me! What does that really mean?
I like to think of this concept in the form of a story. Think about a mother and a father in the hospital room with a child that is near death and a decision needs to be made about the life of the child. The decision needs to be made about whether to pull the plug to allow the life of the child to be maintained on its own or to expire on its own. There is not a mother in the world that I know of that wants to make that decision. In a traditional marriage, the mother has the gift of the husband to take the role as the head of the household to make the decision. He is the ultimate provider in that he steps forward to make the decision by allowing God to make the decision through him. He allows his wife, the mother, to be freed from that decision. What a gift he has given to his wife and family! He took the difficult road and died to himself in order to give life to those he loves the most. How Christ-like the husband and father is in this story. Isn't that about the others in his family, but still about him?
He doesn't need a certain type of wife to be this type of leader. He can be married to the best stay at home mom in the world or the most committed mother who works outside of the home and still be the leader by showing his strength at moments like these.
What's up is that this world is made of so many good men like this and we sometimes forget to build them up. I take my hat off to all the men that lead like Christ - men that lead through compassion and service rather than through recognition and position.
That's what's up in my world. A man that loves me for who I am, and a man that is strong at all times, but with a heart as big as the world that let's me be and continue to grow into a woman that God can use for so many things. That’s what I see in the story of the people around me. Great men that are such an awesome gift from God.
I'll talk to you again soon.
Eileen
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